Temporary

You can probably imagine how much that sucked.

One night had changed everything — even the way I masturbated.

Rubbing out a weak, utterly dissatisfying orgasm almost wasn’t worth the effort.

Almost.

They say that the difference between love and infatuation was four months.

I found myself wondering if Gage had been The One or just The One Who Was Incredibly Hot In Bed But Ultimately A Train Wreck.

It was probably safe to assume the latter, actually.

My cell rang, interrupting my meandering and ultimately morose thoughts, to find my sister calling.

“Hey,” I answered, putting her on speaker so I could thumb through the magazine I’d bought on impulse earlier this morning. “What’s up?”

“We got the packages,” Tara said with worried annoyance. “What are you doing spending money you don’t have on the kids? Don’t get me wrong, it’s a very sweet gesture but…”

I smiled. Tara had probably freaked out when she saw the brand new Virtual Reality gaming system I’d bought for my nephew, Charlie. The kid loved gaming and I’d missed out on too many birthdays to count because I’d been too poor to even send a card. “Tell Charlie it’s for his birthday, Christmas and whatever else holiday out there that I’ve missed,” I said.

“Are you sure you can afford this?” Tara asked, worried. Then her tone suddenly changed, saying, “Oh my God, Mari…are you dying? Is that what this is? Please tell me you’re not sick.”

“I’m not sick. I just got a new job and it pays better than my last,” I fudged a little (okay, a lot, don’t judge me). “C’mon, let me spoil my niece and nephew for once. Do they like their gifts?”

“They love them,” Tara admitted, releasing a huffed breath. “But now that kinda leaves me and Ryan at a loss as to what to get them for their birthdays.”

“Sorrynotsorry,” I quipped, grinning. “I hope you snapped some pics of them losing their minds over that shit because I want to see it.”

Tara laughed. “I’ll email you a few of Charlie running into the wall while playing that virtual game thingy. As for Yasmine, she hasn’t put down that ridiculous doll set since she opened the box. You really spent way too much money,” she admonished but softened, saying, “But it was very sweet. Thank you.”

“No problem.”

“Okay, now tell me about this new job?”

“It’s…like a consulting gig,” I lied, realizing I needed a more solid story if I was going to manage to fool my family, especially Tara. “It’s not long-term or anything but it paid pretty well so I can actually breathe for awhile. I even quit Jimmy’s.”

“You quit your job?” Tara repeated and I could almost see the crease in her forehead forming. If she wasn’t careful Tara would end up needing Botox before she turned twenty-eight. “Do you think that was wise?”

“It’s fine, I promise,” I assured her, wanting to change the subject. I drew a deep breath and jumped into what needed to be said between us. “Look, I wanted to apologize for calling you a stuck up twat when we talked last. I hope you know I didn’t mean it.” Tara’s silence poked at me. That twin thing was in full effect. Damn, I’d really hurt her. Sometimes I wish I wasn’t such a colossal bitch. “Tara, I shouldn’t have said it. There’s no excuse and I’m so sorry. Forgive me?”

Tara heaved a short sigh, saying, “Of course I forgive you, you idiot. I was just worried about you, you know? You’re so far away from everyone and we know your pride won’t let you ask for money to come home. If you wanted, that is. Do you want to come home, Mari?”

That was the million dollar question. Before I had the means to leave New York, it was all I thought about. Now, the money was in my bank and yet, I was dragging my feet to put the wheels in motion.

The thing was, when I tried to picture myself back home, driving the same streets of my childhood, seeing the same people over and over…everyone living the life they’ve always lived (for generations) I got kinda queasy.

At least New York was never boring.

Chaos and art lived side by side in this city without blinking an eye or noticing the disparity between the two.

I loved that.

“Mari?”

Tara’s voice interrupted my thoughts. “I’m sorry…uh, yeah, maybe,” I answered, keeping my response vague. “But I have things I have to finish up here first.”

That part was true.

But even as I left myself some wiggle room, I felt the pressure from across the miles to move home.

My family had been horrified when I’d announced I was moving to New York.

My father nearly choked on his mouthful of asparagus.

My mother paled as if she’d just been given a week to live.

“But it’s so far,” she’d protested, looking to my dad for support. “You don’t know anyone in New York.”

My announcement had effectively ruined dinner that night five years ago.

And my parents hadn’t let me forget since then.

Don’t get me wrong, they weren’t bad people or even bad parents. Maybe that was the problem, they were great parents and they’d known I was going to crash and burn so they’d tried to convince me to stay home.

But if I’d stayed home…I would’ve followed in the same footsteps as Tara — married, kids, a 9-to-5 job, and a husband whose gut softened a little more each year — and I just couldn’t do it.

I can’t go home.

“Well, let us know if you need anything. Oh! Yasmine, stop hitting your brother,” Tara said abruptly, the sound of kids fighting in the background interrupting our talk. “I’m so sorry, I have to call you back later. Yasmine just punched Charlie in the leg!”

“Go girl power,” I quipped with an inappropriate chuckle. My niece liked dolls and all sorts of girly things but she was the kind of kid who wouldn’t hesitate to set someone straight if they were messing with her, including her brother.

Tara clicked off and I tossed my phone to the sofa cushion beside me. Unlike my previous sofa, which was soft and mushy, my new sofa was still a bit stiff, and my cell bounced right to the floor.

I grumbled as I bent to pick it up but a knock at my door stopped me mid-stretch. I wasn’t expecting anyone so curiosity set my feet in motion.

I opened the door and a delivery man stood with a good-sized package. “Mari Jones?” he asked, I confirmed and he handed me the package with professional disinterest, then left.

There was no return address. I opened the package and gasped at the contents.

A state-of-the-art digital SLR camera with all the bells and whistles, a full lens kit and a carry bag — basically anything I could possibly need to start a photography career.

“What the hell?” I murmured, completely confused, until I found a small note at the bottom of the box.

Make your mark.

Tears crowded my sinuses. There was only one person this package could be from…Gage.

Oh. Fuck.

Yep. Totally crying now.

16

Maybe the camera was a goodbye gift.

There’d been a wild hope that Gage would show up on my doorstep but it didn’t happen.

After another week passed and there was no sign of Gage, nor any more mysterious gifts, I let myself cry it out and tried to move on.

But first, I had to tie up loose ends.

My court date with Landon was today — I hadn’t had a chance to hire a lawyer but I was banking on the fact that the custody battle was bullshit and the judge would toss the case.

If things didn’t go my way…I might lose Miss Switch.

If that happened, my next move would be to hire a hitman.

I walked into the courtroom and took a seat, waiting for the judge to enter. I thought it was odd that Landon wasn’t there. Maybe I would win by default?

But suddenly a woman entered the courtroom, walking briskly to my table, surprising me by offering a quick handshake before saying,

“Jane Simmons, I’ll be your counsel,” she said. “I apologize for not contacting you earlier. I received your case this morning.”

Confused, I said, “I’m sorry, I think there’s a mistake…I haven’t hired you.”

“We have a mutual friend,” she stated, leaving it at that before pulling folders from her leather satchel. “Your bill is paid. Now, let’s get this farce of a custody battle over with. Honestly, frivolous lawsuits ought to be outlawed.”

Landon showed up finally, slinking into the courtroom, looking sullen and nervous, which wasn’t a good look on him. How had I ever thought he was attractive?

And I’d wanted to make babies with him? Gross.

Landon’s gaze flicked to me and he visibly gulped at the obvious shark of a lawyer by my side.