Temporary

The crickets chirped as the night wore on. The house settled into silence.

Was Tara right? Should I have taken Reece’s offer to call Gage that day? Would it have made a difference?

I’d been afraid of another rejection. I knew I couldn’t have taken another hit to my heart.

Was Gage okay?

What had Reece meant by “the anniversary?” Anniversary of what?

God, I hated mysteries. I wasn’t cut out for stories with huge holes in the fabric. Maybe that was my version of OCD. I had to patch the holes, had to know all the details before I could move on.

Even if the information was hurtful.

In a way, I was thankful I’d discovered Landon with his cock in someone else’s mouth — there’d been no room for misunderstanding or persuasive lies.

Cut and dry — he’d been cheating.

Made the decision-making process so much easier.

If I hadn’t caught him red-handed, Landon might’ve strung me along for a few more months.

I might’ve even married him.

I gagged at the thought.

So, yes, I truly believed an ugly truth was preferable to a pretty lie.

Landon’s betrayal didn’t hurt anymore — but Gage’s rejection…it still killed.

I could still see his cold expression, the dispassionate, disconnected way he’d offered to create a new “arrangement” that’d felt insulting at best and pitiful at worst.

Is there a greater humiliation than discovering that feelings aren’t shared mutually?

Now I questioned everything. I couldn’t stop the tingle in my belly when I thought of Gage, or the way my breath caught when I thought of his touch on my skin but I could refuse to wallow in the pain of his rejection.

I grabbed my empty wine glass, prepared to go to bed until I heard the tell-tale sounds of someone getting banged.

Roughly.

I choked on a bubble of laugher. Get it, girl. Make that accountant your bitch.

Sticking my earbuds in, I tuned out what was going on upstairs and blissed out to loud, obnoxious rap.

23

“You’re leaving so soon?” Tara whined in dismay when she saw my travel bags packed the next morning. “I had plans for us to take the kids to Yosemite today.”

“I’m sorry, sissy,” I said, pressing a kiss to her cheek. “But I need to clear my head. I’ll take a raincheck on that Yosemite trip, though, okay?” I ruffled my nephew’s hair as he munched his cereal and kissed the crown of my niece as I crossed to grab my keys.

Tara, usually such an early riser, looked wonderfully disheveled and all I could do was give her a mental thumbs up.

“I’ll be gone a few days. I want to head up the coast and take some pictures.”

Tara nodded with understanding but she was disappointed just the same. I hated seeing my sister so sad but I had to do this for me. I couldn’t save Gage because he didn’t want saving but also, I had some work to do on myself, too.

The last true heartfelt advice Gage had given me was, “Make your mark” and I needed to start doing exactly that.

“I have this fancy camera and I haven’t had the time to actually learn how to use it,” I said. “Well, there’s no time like the present, right?”

Ryan entered the kitchen, looking his usual accountant-y self and I so badly wanted to ask if he had any bruises from my sister riding him like a pony but I held my tongue. “Leaving?” he inquired politely, leaning to kiss Tara on her cheek. So polite. Ugh. I wanted to tell him that if he didn’t start grabbing his wife like he meant it, he’d lose her. But again, I bit my tongue.

Hey, I was better at this than I thought.

“Yep. Road trip.”

“I’ve put out a few feelers in the community. The local hotel has an opening for a maid. Let me know if you want a reference.”

I tried not to snarl. Instead I just smiled. “Thanks, Ry. You’re a peach.”

Tara frowned, creating that small crease in her forehead and I wanted to thump her in the head to make her stop. She surprised me with a clipped defense, “Mari isn’t taking a job as a maid, Ryan. She has far too many skills. Besides, she doesn’t need a job just yet. Her last consulting job paid more than you make in a year. I think she can afford a little wanderlust.”

I nearly choked on the toast I’d stuffed in my mouth to keep from saying something I’d regret.

Ryan blinked at his wife’s change in demeanor and actually stammered his response, “W-wow, good for you, Mari. Okay, well, I have to hit the office.” After quick perfunctory kisses for everyone but me (Thank you, Lord Baby Jesus) Ryan went on his merry way.

“Whoa and damn, girl,” was all I said under my breath but I was so delighted I wanted to crow and clap my hands like a drunken monkey, saying, y’all better buckle up; the sleeper has awakened, yo.

Once the kids were on the bus and off to school, I said my goodbyes to Tara.

It actually hurt more than I thought it would because I felt as if I was walking away from the opportunity to really know my sister.

“Still gonna play the obedient housewife?” I asked, curious.

“When it suits me.”

“And when it doesn’t?”

“Then, I won’t.”

I laughed. “Ryan might not survive the climate change in your bedroom.”

“Change is good,” Tara said with a shrug. “Besides, I didn’t hear him complaining. Not that he could’ve with that sock stuffed in his mouth.”

I gaped with delighted shock. “Jesus, Tara…who knew you were so…bossy. What’s next? Leather corsets, whips and chains?”

“Who knows? I do look good in leather, though.”

“I like this new Tara,” I admitted. “I wish I could stay to get to know her better.”

“I’m not going anywhere,” Tara promised with a soft smile. “Go find your bliss, sissy. It’s out there.”

I blinked back tears and hugged her hard.

It wasn’t an ending, I told myself, but a beginning.

As we walked to my car, Tara asked, curious, “What was his name?”

I paused a minute, waiting for the ache to pass. “Gage. Gage Donnelly.”

Tara frowned as she murmured, “I wonder if he was related to Dustin Donnelly…”

I stopped short. “I’d wondered the same thing. Seems unlikely, right?”

Tara pursed her lips in thought, shaking her head. “The world would have to be awfully small if they were related. Dustin’s dad…he was bad news.”

“How do you know Dustin? He was younger than us.”

“I was his senior mentor. You know how all the seniors were assigned a freshman the first day of school our senior year?” I nodded, vaguely remembering something like that. “Well, Dustin was my freshman.”

“Seriously?”

“Yeah, they moved before the end of the year. Dustin always came to school with bruises but when I asked him about them, he said it was from dirt-biking. I wasn’t sure if I believed him but what could I do? I was just a teenager, too.”

I chewed my lip. “Do you know if he had an older brother?”

Tara didn’t know. “I never asked,” she admitted. “But he must’ve been older than us because I don’t remember a Donnelly in our class, do you?”

I’d already checked the yearbook so I knew the answer was no.

“So what makes you think his dad was abusive if Dustin wouldn’t admit that his dad was giving him the bruises?”

“You know that vibe you get from people when there’s just something wrong with them?” Tara shared, shuddering at the memory. “I met the dad once when he came to pick up Dustin at school one day. The guy had the meanest eyes I’d ever seen. And the way he’d looked at Dustin…I felt bad for the kid.”

I felt sick. What if the two were related? Had something happened to Dustin? Was that the anniversary Reece had mentioned?

Tara shook off the memory. “Well, it was a long time ago. I’m sure it’s

nothing. I doubt they’re even related. What are the odds, right?”

“Pretty astronomical,” I murmured but my thoughts were racing. I needed to do some digging, if only to ease my own mind. I kissed Tara on the cheek before climbing into the car. “Don’t go too easy on Ryan. I think he digs the new Tara.”

I didn’t know if that were true but I got a private giggle at the thought of him bound and trussed up like a Christmas turkey, getting his ass whipped by my leather-corseted, housewife-turned-Domme sister while rides him with a strap-on.

Maybe it wouldn’t go that far but I hoped it would. It would be the most interesting thing I’d ever associate Ryan with in the entire time I’d known him.

As I put my hometown in my rearview, I made some calls. Thankfully, I still had that PI in my phone. I had another job for him.

Good, bad or ugly, I just needed some answers.

And maybe some closure.

24

Dustin Donnelly was dead.