The Daughter In Law
“Okay asshole why are you following me around?” I spoke loud enough to draw the attention of the other patrons.
“Excuse me?”
“No excuse, you’ve been following me around for the last hour or so, what gives?” By now we had a nice little audience and Mr. Hot shot was backpedaling fast. He tried to leave but I blocked his path. “Oh no you don’t you tell me who you are or I’m calling the cops.” I held my phone up ready to call. He held up his finger and I almost snapped it off. “Hey, one minute just chill.” He reached for his phone and all I heard was ‘she made me’. Then he held the phone out to me. I gave him, and it, a curious look, like it was a snake coiled to strike.
“Hello?”
“Hello sweetheart I see you’ve met Tony.”
“Dami, you know this guy?”
“Yep, he’s your shadow.”
“My what, why do I need one of those?”
“Because I said so.”
“But…”
“He stays. I’ll see you when I get home, love you.” He hung up the phone. What the hell? Why did I need a guard following me around? Was this about Yeti? What the hell had gone on in that hospital room anyway? Tonight he’s telling me everything or I’ll light the damn place to the ground. This shit was just beyond.
“Damien.”
“What?”
“I know you can feel me boring holes in your head with my glare.”
He forked another bite of my succulent wine steak in his mouth. It’s my own personal recipe that I made up when I was experimenting a while back, kind of my twist on hunter’s stew if you’d like. I soak the steak in port wine and some other herbs and spices, let it marinate for a spell, and then char broil it. Damien just about gnaws his fingers off when I make it for him. The creature from the black lagoon claims her son only likes her cooking, and I should take lessons from her. My ass, I’ve never seen him go back for seconds any of the million times she’d made us come over there before his deployment. Looking back I wish I’d gouged her in the eye with a fork.
“I was wondering if you were having some sort of mental pause.”
“Har, har funny, start dishing big boy, what’s with the security at the gate and now this shadow guy?”
“I told you, they’re there to look after you while I’m not here.”
“Um; lots of men leave their wives everyday and go off to work, I don’t think they all hire extra muscle to follow them around. What happened, did your momsie dearest threaten me?” He kept plugging away at that steak like he hadn’t heard me.
“Vanessa I already told you that’s not something we’re going to discuss…”
“Now see, that’s not gonna work. I’m in the need to know business, I need to know exactly what Eva Braun said, did and thought.”
“Who are you talking about now, is that Hitler’s girlfriend?”
“That’s one of my names for your incubator, now stop changing the subject and spill.”
“I said no, now stop asking. Your problem with my mother is that she’s too controlling right? that’s one of the things you said? So why are you now trying to control me? is it your idea for me to slip one noose for another?”
“I’m not trying to control you, you ass; I’m trying to prepare myself for whatever asshole scheme that demon from Satan’s armpit comes up with next. How can you be so damn clueless?”
“Don’t get yourself all upset, I wish you would just calm the hell down and stay out of it.”
“I can’t stay out of it because she dragged me into it a long time ago. She started this shit and contrary to what you think she’s never going to leave me out of it. You just don’t get it, her fight’s not with you, you’re her precious golden boy; I’m the one she’s trying to eliminate.” He was so working on raising my blood pressure right now. I was giving some serious thought to lobbing a baked potato at his head.
“She’s not going to get near you Vanessa stop worrying about this shit. All you’re doing is making this shit harder on me. I told you I have it under control so just leave it.”