Watership Down (Watership Down 1)

' "But he was," shouted Hufea. "He was singing'O Slug-a-moon! O Slug-a-moon! O grant -' "

' "What the hedgehog sang is not evidence," said El-ahrairah. "Really, one is inclined to wonder what is. Well, all right. We saw a hedgehog covered with roses, singing a song on a box. What happened then?"

' "Well," said Hufsa, "then we went on and came to the pond, where we saw a pheasant."

' "Pheasant, eh?" said one of the foxes. "I wish I'd seen it. What was it doing?"

' "It was swimming round and round in the water -" said Hufsa.

' "Wounded, eh?" said the fox.

"No, no," said Hufsa. "They all do that, to make their tails grow longer. I'm surprised you don't know."

' "To make what?" said the fox.

' "To make their tails grow longer," said Hufsa sulkily. "He said so himself."

' "You've only had this stuff for a very short time," said El-ahrairah to the elil. "It takes a bit of getting used to. Look at me. I've been forced to live with it for the last two months, day in and day out. I've been as kind and understanding as I can, but apparently just to my own harm."

'A silence fell. El-ahrairah, with an air of fatherly patience, turned back to the witness.

' "My memory is so bad," he said. "Do go on."

' "Well, El-ahrairah," said Hufsa, "you're pretending very cleverly, but even you won't be able to say you've forgotten what happened next. A huge, terrifying rabbit, with a red tail and green ears, came out of the grass. He had a white stick in his mouth and he plunged into the ground down a great hole. He told us he was going through the middle of the earth to see Lord Frith on the other side."

"This time not one of the elil said a word. They were staring at Hufsa and shaking their heads.

' "They're all mad, you know," whispered one of the stoats," nasty little beasts. They'll say anything when they're cornered. But this one is the worst I've ever heard. How much longer have we got to stay here? I'm hungry."

'Now El-ahrairah had known beforehand that while elil detest all rabbits, they would dislike most the one who looked the biggest fool. That was why he had agreed to a jury of elil. A jury of rabbits might have tried to get to the bottom of Hufsa's story; but not the elil, for they hated and despised the witness and wanted to be off hunting as soon as they could.

' "So it comes to this," said El-ahrairah. "We saw a hedgehog covered with roses, singing a song: and then we saw a perfectly healthy pheasant swimming round and round the pond: and then we saw a rabbit with a red tail, green ears and a white stick, and he jumped straight down a deep well. Is that right?"

' "Yes," said Hufsa.

' "And then we stole the carrots?"

' "Yes."

' "Were they purple with green spots?"

' "Were what purple with green spots?"

' "The carrots."

' "Well, you know they weren't, El-ahrairah. They were the ordinary colour. They're down the hole!" shouted Hufsa desperately, "Down the hole! Go and look!"

'The court adjourned while Hufsa led Prince Rainbow to the hole. They found no carrots and returned.

' "I've been underground all day," said El-ahrairah," and I can prove it. I ought to have been asleep, but it's very difficult when m'learned friend - well, never mind. I simply mean that obviously I couldn't have been out moving carrots or anything else. If there ever were any carrots," he added. "But I've nothing more to say."

' "Prince Rainbow," said the cat, "I hate all rabbits. But I don't see how we can possibly say that it's been proved that that rabbit took your carrots. The witness is obviously out of his mind - mad as the mist and snow - and the prisoner will have to be released." They all agreed.

' "You had better go quickly," said Prince Rainbow to El-ahrairah. "Go down your hole, El-ahrairah, before I hurt you myself."

' "I will, my lord," said El-ahrairah. "But may I beg you to remove that rabbit you sent among us, for he troubles us with his foolishness?"

'So Hufsa went away with Prince Rainbow and El-ahrairah's people were left in peace, apart from indigestion brought on by eating too many carrots. But it was a long time before Rabscuttle could get his tail white again, so my grandfather always said.'