Lyrics on the Wind (Lost Kings MC 17)

“Told me what?”

Her throat works as she struggles for words and breath. That can only mean she’s about to mention my sister. Which makes sense. Hayley and my father’s departure are so deeply and painfully intertwined in our family history.

“Your father and I…even if Hayley hadn’t…we would’ve split up.”

I piece together her fragmented sentences. “Really?”

“His reaction…the way he handled Hayley’s diagnosis…shredded me. Some couples, a tragedy reveals who each person is at their core. Their strengths complement one another and bond them together. Or it exposes their weaknesses and breaks them apart.”

“I remember you fighting a lot,” I whisper. “Now I can see it was a tremendous amount of pressure for both of you to be under.”

“Our finances made it worse, but that wasn’t all of it. Instead of being stronger together, we turned on each other. He wanted me to work more so we weren’t so broke but I couldn’t not take care of Hayley. Be with her. It was an impossible choice.” Her eyes shimmer with tears. “Well, not impossible. I would’ve moved into our car rather than leave my baby girl alone in the hospital.”

My throat tightens and tears blur my vision.

“We still had you, so maybe that was irresponsible on my part,” she says. “Neither of us were wrong, I guess…”

I sure think one of them had it backwards. “I wasn’t neglected,” I whisper. “And I never resented the time spent with Hayley. I wanted—” My voice breaks. “I wanted to be with her as much as possible. I would’ve hated it if you were working instead of at the hospital with her.”

“Thank you, Shelby. It means a lot to hear that,” she says softly, as if my simple admission lifted a weight off her shoulders.

“Anyway, I don’t hate your father for leaving me. I hate him for leaving you. You’d already lost your sister. Losing your father too…I can never forgive him for that.”

“Do you…do you think something happened to him?” The little girl in me always wonders if maybe my father died and that’s why he never contacted me again.

“No.” She kills that theory with one word. “I tracked him down once. Begged him to see you. At least spend time with you. But he refused. I never told you because…”

“I understand.” It doesn’t feel good to hear that now; I can’t imagine how a younger, more vulnerable me would’ve swallowed the rejection.

“I’m sorry. I never wanted to tell you that.”

“I’d rather know.” As much as it hurts, I prefer living with the truth than constantly wondering.

“You were such a joy, Shelby. In the darkest part of my life, you kept me going. I’m sorry if that put a burden on you. It broke my heart that he left. I couldn’t understand how he chose to miss out on your life. Maybe that’s why I worked extra hard to be so involved in everything you did. To make up for what you’d lost.” She reaches over and cups my cheek. “I’m proud to be your momma. Watching you grow up and become the woman you are is the best thing I’ve ever done. He’s a fool for missin’ out on it.”

My throat’s so tight, I barely choke out a “thank you.”

She sighs and delicately wipes a finger under her lashes. “That’s enough emotional talk. I don’t want a stuffed-up head on the plane.”

I force a smile and a bit of a laugh. “I’m surprised you’re gettin’ on a plane at all.”

She narrows her eyes. “Don’t remind me. I was so worried about you on the way here, I didn’t have time to fret about it.”

“You’ll be okay.”

“God bless Rooster for organizing everything for me.”

“Wait, what?”

Pink spreads over her cheeks. “He’s certainly a man of action. Had all the arrangements made before he called me.” She drops her gaze. “I don’t know how I’m gonna repay him. I’m sure that last-minute ticket cost a bunch.”

“Wait. He did that?”

“Yes. How else do you think I was able to get here?”

Jeez, and she still had the nerve to give me grief.

As if she read my thoughts, she says, “I do like Rooster, honey. If you were more…settled in this new phase of your life, maybe I wouldn’t worry so much.”

I snort. “At least I know he’s not after me for my money.”

She bites her lip. “Eventually, you might be making a lot more, honey.”

“Big might. I might also be waitressing again.”

“You need to believe in yourself.”

“I do.”

“Afternoon, ladies.” Rooster’s warm greeting lights a fire in me.

Before I even know what I’m doing, I jump out of my chair, knocking it backwards. I slip my arms around him, dragging him down for a long hello kiss. “I missed you,” I whisper against his lips.

“Missed you too.” He presses a quicker kiss to my lips. “I’ll go away more often if you always greet me that way.”