Holding On (Ruthless Sinners MC 2)

“Damn, I knew that shit wasn’t a good idea.” He lowered his head with regret. “I didn’t want no part of that. Poor girl didn’t have shit to do with anything. Just in the wrong place at the wrong fucking time. Didn’t deserve none of what happened to her, especially that beating. That shit wasn’t right.” He looked up at me and added, “It was up to me to finish her off, but I just couldn’t do it. I stabbed her in places where it wouldn’t fuck her up too bad.”

“How are the Punishers connected to Detective Mathews and Detective Long?”

“That’s some bullshit right there. That Mathews fella is a real piece of shit. He’s in deep, man. Real deep.” He lowered his head and grumbled out a curse, then looked up at me. “I’ll tell you anything you want to know. I just have one request.”

I shook my head as I scoffed, “You’re in no position to be making requests.”

“I get that, but I got one all the same,” he said with an anguished expression on his face. “I’ll tell you everything you need to know. Hell, I’ll tell you shit that no one else knows about. I just ask that you put a bullet in my head when I’m done to end all this fucking shit once and for all.”

“You being serious right now?”

“Hell, yeah. Been doing this shit for way too long, man. Lost everyone I care about. My ol’ lady and my kids, and for what? The Punishers haven’t done shit for me. They just take and take until there’s nothing left. That’s what they do. There’s nothing good in those men no more. Not sure there ever was, but I’m done with it.”

“Not sure what you’re getting at.”

“The way I see it, some folks were born to be buried. Figure the same goes for me.” He muttered something incoherent under his breath. “I’ll tell you what you need to know. It’s not like you’re just gonna let me walk out of here, so I might as well be getting to where I belong.”

“Understood.” I had no idea what McKinney had to share, but I hoped he was about to tell me everything we needed and some. I grabbed a stool and sat down in front of him. “You’ve put me in a giving mood, so I’ll make a deal with you. The more you talk, the less painful your death will be.”

“You got yourself a deal.” Alfonzo let out a deep sigh before saying, “The Punishers have been my life for as long as I can remember. Hell, I was just fifteen when I joined up, and back then, it was cool. Not like the gang shit you see today. We had each other’s backs. We lived by a code, but that all changed the day Scar came into the picture.”

“Who’s Scar?”

“Honestly never met the guy. Just know he’s the one running the show.” A sadness filled his eyes as he explained, “He got to Lucifer, our leader at the time. He’s the one who convinced him to get us boys to start running his product. Promised that we’d make bank, so Lucifer bought in. That’s when everything started going south.”

Seeing that he was getting emotional, I gave him a moment to collect himself. After a few seconds Alfonzo said, “You know how it is when you’re running smack. Deals go bad, and when they do, it doesn’t turn out well for anyone. Hell, I learned that the hard way. Instead of coming after me, motherfucker sent a crew after my family. Killed my wife, and she didn’t have shit to do with any of it. A few days later, my boy was shot in a drive-by.”

I could hear the pain in his voice, and no lie, it got to me. I knew that kind of loss and how it changes someone in unimaginable ways. It certainly changed me. As I stood there listening to him, I thought back to the day I buried my folks.

It was in late June, hot as hell with the sun bearing down on us as we listened to the preacher give his spiel. All I could do was stare at my parents’ caskets and wonder why they’d been taken from me. Not many people were at their funeral. Just a few of my parents’ friends and coworkers, and of course, Ada. She was standing next to me, her arm draped protectively over my shoulder as I sobbed. She was my only comfort, and I was about to lose her too. Knowing it was our last time together, she leaned down and whispered, “Yous gonna have to be strong, son. Da good Lord don’t give us nothin’ we can’t handle, and together, we’ll finds a way through dis.”

I wiped a tear from the corner of my eye as I replied, “But we won’t be together, Ada.”