Wanted (Wanted 1)

I ran up to the table and asked Amanda where Ellie was.

“Well, since you were practically fucking that girl on the dance floor, Ellie told Jeff she wanted to leave and asked him to walk her to her car. ” Amanda said as she gave me a look that should have knocked me to my knees. That girl just gave new meaning to ‘If Looks could kill’……

As soon as I got out of the club I started to run towards where I had parked Ellie’s car earlier. I heard Jeff call out my name.

I stopped and turned around to see him walking across the street.

“She’s gone. ” Jeff said has he walked up to me with his hands in hi

s pockets.

“NO! OH FUCK!. . . . FUCKING HELL! What the hell did I just do?!” I yelled out as I jammed my hands through my hair.

I looked at Jeff who just had a blank look on his face. “Why did she leave? Was it because I was dancing with Lori? She told me to. She made sure she let Lori know we were only friends and told me to go dance. I tried to tell Lori I didn’t want to. Oh fucking hell……” I said as I started to pace back and forth.

“Dude, did you fucking know how you looked out there? You were grinding your dick all into Lori’s ass while Ellie sat there and watched it. Then Lori’s little stunt of sticking her finger in her mouth and sucking on it while you held onto her hips grinding away on her you prick. What did you think she was going to do? Sit there and watch. ”

I had to lean over. I had that sick feeling in my stomach again that I woke up with earlier this morning.

“No…. no…… shit no…I had to fucking keep eyes closed the whole time. The whole fucking time all I was doing was picturing Ellie dancing with me. FUCK! I was so pissed at her for pulling out the fucking friend’s card again I guess I was just pissed and not thinking about how it would look to her. ”

I had to lean back over again…. . ”Oh shit…I think I’m going to get sick. ”

Jeff slapped me on the back of the head. What the fuck?

“First off fucker…that’s my sister you are day dreaming about…. . and second…. you better fucking make this right somehow. ”

Next thing I knew I was throwing up and Jeff was telling me he was going to get his truck. I had to talk to Ellie. I had to explain…. .

CHAPTER TWENTY SEVEN

Ellie……

It had been three weeks since I last saw Gunner. He called me every morning and I never answered. I thought after the first few days he would just give up. Same thing every night and each time he would leave me a message. I cried every time I listened to him beg for me to call him back. This morning he left the longest message and it tore me apart.

He said since I wouldn’t call him he was just leaving it on my voicemail. He told me how upset he had been that I made him dance with Lori, he said he had to close his eyes and imagine that he was dancing with me. He just kept telling me how sorry he was and that he was so pissed he didn’t even realize how it looked…. It almost sounded like he was crying as he begged me to call him back. He was starting to sound just as bad as I felt.

Ari knocked and opened the bedroom door. “Hey, we’re moving into the cottage today. ”

“Sounds good…. . I just need to get a few more things packed up. ” I said with a weak smile. After looking at apartments near campus the last two weeks and deciding we would have to work a full time job to afford anything, we took Ari’s parents up on their offer to let us live in their 2 bedroom cottage guest house.

Ari came and sat down next to me. “Did he call again Ells?”

I started to cry and handed her my cell phone. Ari listened to the voicemail.

“Holy fuck Ellie. Can you not hear it in his voice? He said he’s sorry…he is begging you!”

“I can’t get the image of him dancing with her out of my head Ari!”

“Ellie he said he was thinking of you. Do you not think that maybe that is why he got a little bit too much into the dancing? You went out with Rich last week and you even said you had to pretend it was Gunner almost all night just to get through the date. Why is it so impossible for him to have to do the same thing? He made a mistake Ellie, and in a way I’m sure you confused the shit out of him with you offering him up to that bitch like that. ”

I looked up at Ari. She had a point. She had talked me into going on a double date with her and Jason and Jason’s cousin Rich. I had a terrible time and thought about Gunner the whole time. I did push him into dancing with Lori…. I knew that. Fuck it was just hard to admit it.

“Ari it is impossible for me to do this. I am so scared of being hurt and I have such strong feelings for him…. it scares me shitless!”

Ari let out a laugh. “I am going to pull a Susan on you…. . ’Nothing is impossible. The word itself says I’m possible’…. The great Audry Hepburn, but we won’t let mom know we didn’t quote Katharine!”

I started to laugh. Ari always had a way of making me laugh when all I wanted to do was cry.