Lucas (Cold Fury Hockey 8)

"Now I really feel like shit," I mutter in acknowledgment to the absolutely perfect fucking words she's saying to me right now to diffuse the situation.

"Don't," she says.

"I'm a moron," I grouse.

"But a cute moron," she says with a tiny grin and a bat of her eyelashes at me to lighten the fuck up.

"I'm sorry," I tell her as my arms gather her in close to me. She hugs me back and pats me on my ass, again in a move to cut the tension.

She pulls her head back to look at me solemnly. "Let's go in and get you packed up and off to the arena. I'll be at the game tonight with Simone screaming my ass off for you. And then I'll stay with you tonight and just get up a little earlier to go into work, okay?"

"I don't deserve that kind of response from you when I was just such a dick."

"You were a dick," she concurs with a laugh. "The big thing is you're aware of it, and perhaps you can figure a way to not do that again."

"Of course I can," I tell her with a huge exhale of contentment. "I hate I took this out on you. Of all people, it shouldn't be you."

"You're forgiven." She squeezes my waist hard so I know she's telling the truth.

"I should take it out on Simone," I mutter as an afterthought when I release Stephanie. "She's the one who moved my lucky underwear."

She stares at me a moment, then bursts out laughing. I grin back at her before taking her face in my hands and giving her a knockout kiss that takes her breath away.

"I'm sorry," I say again softly when I lift my mouth from hers.

"It's fine. We're fine."

"Lucas," we both hear Simone calling out, and we turn to see her standing on the porch holding my phone. "You got a call. It's Mom."

"My good luck call," I say to Stephanie in explanation as I take her hand. "She always calls before a game, but not my dad. He texts because he's too nervous to talk."

"That's adorable," she returns sweetly. "Are you nervous?"

I shake my head. "Not really. We're ready and we're playing the best we've played all season."

"I love confidence," Stephanie praises me as we cross the lawn. "Your quiet type of self-esteem. You're not bold or cocky, but completely composed and genuine. It's one of the reasons that you're so comforting to be around."

I stop in midstride and look down at her with shock over her words. This is very unlike Stephanie to admit these things without a lot of provocation; she usually does so only after I've wrecked her with orgasms.

"What?" she says in mock offense as she takes in my astonishment. "I can be complimentary."

I grin at her before I give her swift, hard kiss of appreciation because she's so fucking cute and awesome and I love it when she's out of her element. I love that she's growing continually and it makes me so fucking hopeful for the future.

She grumbles something under her breath and pushes me toward the porch. "Go answer your phone call."

Laughing, I let her hand go and trot up the steps to snag the phone from Simone. "Hey, Mom."

"Wanted to wish you luck, sweetheart," she says in her mom voice that brings back memories of her packing me off and out the door to hockey practice growing up. She always wished Max and me luck on our way out. She continues, "I don't want to hold you up on game day, but your father and I would like to come in next weekend if that's okay with you to meet Stephanie."

"Okay," I say casually, although I'm excited as hell on the inside. "Sounds like a plan, and I'll let Simone and Max know too."

My eyes go to Stephanie as she watches me in silence, and I listen as my mom makes her goodbyes. When I hang up, I tell her, "My parents are coming next weekend for a visit."

"Because they want to see you play hockey?" she guesses.

My lips tip upward in amusement. "Because they want to meet the woman carrying their grandchild."

"Shit," she mutters, and both Simone and I laugh at her.

"Suck it up, buttercup," Simone teases. "Whether you like it or not, you're stuck with this family now."

I note with alarm that Stephanie actually goes a little pale. I can almost read her emotions, like she just got hit with a shocking wave of realization that there's no getting away from my family.

The panic coming off her is almost palpable as she realizes she's going from being utterly alone in the world to having a huge support system that she didn't ask for, nor did she think she ever needed.

She swallows and puts on a brave smile, and it makes me fall for her even harder. I loop my arm around her neck and pull her into me so I can guide her up the steps.

I lean over and kiss the top of her head, murmuring, "Don't worry, Stephy. You'll get used to all of this eventually."

She snorts. "Or it will drive me to drink."

"Not until after the delivery, though," I say sternly.

Her response is an elbow to the ribs, which makes me laugh and squeeze her harder into me.

Chapter 18

Stephanie

I reach across my kitchen table, which is now littered with so much paper I can't even see the wood of the tabletop. I flip through a few things and pull out my stack of credit card statements for the last three months. I flip through them, placing a check beside essential needs I'd purchased and crossing through items that were nothing more than wants.

After that's done, I use the calculator on my phone and add up all of the checked items to determine what would be my average monthly credit card debt if I cut back my spending to just the bare necessities.

Turns out there's not much to cut, as I've never been one to succumb to extravagant purchases.

With a frustrated sigh, I push the statements away and grab the stack of bills for my utilities. It's pointless to look at them because there's nothing I can really cut. I need electricity and water, and I don't have cable. I only pay for Internet access, and that's unfortunately a necessity as well.

Sitting back in my chair, I throw the bills and pen down, looking at the mess before me. It looks as jumbled and out of sorts as the mess that's become my lif

e in the last eleven hours.

I had walked into work eager to start my day, but instead I found Mr. Wagoner waiting for me in my office.

Correction. Not my office anymore.

Seems the budget constraints could not be overcome and unfortunately my job was one of five eliminated.

"It's with a pained and heavy heart that we're terminating your position immediately," he'd said, and truthfully, he did look distressed. I was numb, however, and nothing really penetrated. Not even when he finished with, "But we are going to give you two weeks of severance pay."

That was nice.

I suppose.

I stayed in sort of a daze for the entire walk back to my apartment, carrying only my purse. I didn't even have a pathetic little box with my personal items because I didn't have any photos of family and I'm not really a knickknack person. I only had a paperweight in the shape of a NC State Wolfpack head and that felt heavy in my purse.

I came home, took off my work clothes, put on jammies, and I crawled into bed. I pulled the quilt over my head to shut out the bright light of day. I settled into the mattress and opened myself up to hopelessness and depression that I was essentially jobless and only weeks away from abject poverty if I continued to ignore the trust fund from my parents, as I've done since I was twenty-one when it came to me.

I lie there, and lie there, and lie there, waiting to fall into a deep slumber that had an "I don't give a shit about anything" vibe written all over it.

But then I got a call, and for the first time ever, I can admit my mom did something good for me. It was short, because I cut it off pretty quickly, but it was impactful.

"Stephanie," my mom said in her professional boardroom voice. "I've been thinking about this pregnancy."

"Okay," I'd said, shocked as hell she called. Shocked as hell I even picked up. And shocked as hell that she wanted to discuss something so personal.

My shock turned to inflamed outrage when she said, "Have you considered an abortion? It would be an easy solution to your problem."

I couldn't even respond I was so blown away by her words. She continued. "You're not really equipped to handle a baby. You've got a useless degree, a career with no upward mobility, and you really just job hop around, living more hand to mouth than anything."

My jaw actually dropped. I mean, I didn't think either one of my parents could offend me more than they have with their appalling neglect of me growing up, but well...she did it. I'm shocked speechless.