Storm (Ashes & Embers 1)

“Hey, chickie,” Amy says brightly.

“How was your breakfast date?”

“Ugh. He was cute, but I was so damn tired, I think I looked like shit. Fucker should know women need some time in the morning. I think he does this first date breakfast on purpose to see how brain-dead and fug we look before we’re fully awake. It’s genius really.”

“What’s his name?”

“Ryan Something. I can’t remember. He’s a realtor. We’re going to have dinner tomorrow night. I kind of like him, he seems to have his shit together.”

“Well, keep me updated. He sounds interesting.”

“We shall see. Date four seems to be the magic number of whether they turn into supreme assholes or have mommy issues. So, have you talked to Storm since the show?”

“Yeah... We talked last night on the phone. He let that skank blow him.”

“Oh, shit. I’m sorry, Ev.”

“It hurts like mad, Aim. Like seriously. I want to just scream and cry, to be honest. He did apologize, though. He said he was pissed over what happened. He told me he doesn’t kiss her or touch her, just uses her and gets rid of her. That really doesn’t make me feel a whole lot better.”

“I think this is what he’s been doing for a long time. You said he hasn’t been in a relationship in years.”

“He hasn’t. Anyway, we kind of came to an agreement. He doesn’t want me having sex with Mike and he says he’s not going to touch any more skanks. He says he just wants to be with me. I made up my mind, Aim. I want to give him a chance. I’m going to put together a plan to leave Michael. I can’t just do it and leave today, though. I need to figure some stuff out.”

“Wow, Evelyn. It’s about time. I’m really proud of you.”

“I’m scared. I don’t know how I’m going to do this.”

“Evelyn, I’ll help you. You can do this. He’s trying, right?

I sigh and rub my forehead. “He really is, Amy. I’m trying really hard to believe he’s not going to just play with me for a while and then skip out.”

“Give him some time. Remember, this is new for him, too. Do you think you’re going to move out?”

“I know, you’re right. And yes, eventually, I will need to find like a cheap studio apartment near the office.”

“Well, lemme ask Ryan tomorrow. He might know of some places.”

“That would be great, actually. Thanks.”

“I gotta run. I’ll call ya soon.”

Our conversation brought Storm’s messing around with Juggsy back into my mind. Just the idea of her putting her glossy lips on him makes me feel sick and furious. And jealous. Knowing he went from licking me to being sucked by her makes me want to scream. Knowing there wasn’t any feeling behind it for him doesn’t make me feel any better. I’m sure there were feelings there for her. I saw how she kept her eyes on him like an eagle.

And even worse? I’ve never given a blowjob. Ever.

I pull out my goal journal and scribble, I need a Blowjobs for Dummies. Stat.

Shit is getting real.

After dinner, Michael tells me he is going out of town for work again for a few days. Three, possibly four. For the first time, I am relieved and not mad or disappointed. I just nod at him and say okay.

I do some laundry and take a long shower, trying to stall bedtime. I sit on the toilet lid and check my phone for new messages. None. I want to send Storm one, but don’t want to seem clingy. I delete some junk emails. I read a few pages of an eBook on my phone.

My phone beeps with a new message. Excited, I open up my message app. It’s not from Storm, but it’s just as good. It’s from Amy and its two photos of Storm and me. Thought you might like these, she writes. Wow. We actually do look cute together. I’m so much shorter than he is, barely making it to his shoulder. He looks huge next to me. In the first one, he’s got his muscled arms around me and we’re both smiling at the camera. In the second one, we’re not looking at the camera. He’s bent down, his head resting against mine, and I’m turned into him, my hand on his chest. Amy took this without us knowing. It’s when he told me I looked beautiful. I love this picture. I forward them over to Storm.

I wait. I don’t want to leave the bathroom until I hear back from him.

I floss. I brush my teeth. I straighten the towels.

Beep.

Storm: Look at us

Me: Amy just sent it to me. :)

Storm: I’ve been beaming all fucking day. Now this. The guys will think I’m mental smiling so much.

Me: LOL. I’ve been smiling, too. Every time I think of you.

Storm: Tell me it’s all the time or I will spank you

Me: Yes, you’ve invaded my thoughts 24/7. Mission accomplished.

Storm: Legit. I knew I’d conquer your stubborn ass eventually :)

Me: Now you’ll be bored with me :/

Storm: No way, baby. I have lots in store for you.

Squee!!

Me: I better go. I just wanted to say goodnight and show the pix

Storm: Where are you sleeping

Shit.

Me: I’m not sure yet. I’m stalling in the bathroom right now hoping he’ll be asleep when I get out.

Storm: How many times per week?

Me: What??

Storm: How many times per week do you guys have sex

Me: So rude!! There’s no set number! It’s just whenever he wants to.

Silence.

Me: And just so you know, it’s just like you and that girl, he just sticks it in. There’s no foreplay or anything. It’s like five minutes.

Silence.

Me: I don’t enjoy it at all. I fake orgasm every time

Storm: I’m going to fuckin punch something

Me: Storm, no. Come on, we were having such a nice day :(

Storm: I know. But fuck.

Me: Is she there, too?

Storm: Who?

Me: You know who.

Storm: Yes, but I’m not going anywhere near her. I made it clear to her this morning that I’m off limits.

Me: Really? You did?

Storm: Yes

Me: Thank you

Storm: I expect the same, Evie

Me: You know this is harder for me! I live with him!

Storm: Then you had better start getting headaches every day. I will lose my shit if I know you’re sleeping with him every night.

Me: I promise I will do the best I can, but I need some time to get away from him. I can’t just move out

Storm: Why not?

Me: Hello? I have nowhere to live. I need to find an apartment

Storm: Fuck that. I have two houses.

Me: I’m not moving into your house. I can’t do that. And I need to be close to the office.

Storm: Can I call you

Me: No. He’s in the next room. He’ll hear me talking

Storm: Then answer it and just listen to me. I can’t do all this fucking typing. You don’t have to talk.

Ugh!!!

Me: Fine, give me a sec to turn the sound off

A minute later, my phone vibrates. I answer it.

“You don’t have to talk. I just can’t do all this typing. My fingers hurt from playing so much the past few days.” He pauses. “I know you’re tryin’, Evie. I am, too. This ain’t gonna be easy for either of us. These are just speed bumps, though. We’ll figure it out. I was so fuckin’ happy today, just knowing you were finally letting me in. Knowing you were seriously thinking about us. But you gotta understand one thing about me, when I want something, I don’t stop until I get it. And I don’t share well. Somehow, you got under my skin and I’m crazy wanting you. I’m a very sexual person, Evie, I’m not gonna lie. But this isn’t just about sex with you. I have real feelings for you. That on top of wanting to devour you is a dangerous combo for me. This is something I’ve never had before. You following me?”

“Yes,” I whisper.

“Good. If you want to be with me, I can’t share you. I

can’t be half way across the country driving myself crazy wanting you, knowing you could be in bed with him and him touching you. I will lose my effing mind. I know this is gonna be hard for you and he’s gonna get pissed. If you want to move out tomorrow, you can move into my place. Or I’ll send you money for your own place. I don’t care.”

“I can’t just do that, Storm. Give me some time to work this out please.,” I whisper, praying Michael can’t hear me.

“He’s leaving tomorrow for three or four days.”

“Thank fuck.”