Buttons and Lace (Buttons 1)

I was immensely attracted to Crow. He gave me the kind of sex I didn’t believe existed. He pleased me so well, and he seemed to enjoy giving me orgasms as much as receiving them. I tried to pretend I didn’t love his cock inside me, but I couldn’t do it anymore. Crow manipulated me right where he wanted me to be.

And I crumbled.

I betrayed Jacob. When Bones raped me, I couldn’t stop it. But I could stop Crow. I simply chose not to. How much would that break Jacob’s heart? I was enjoying sex with another man. Actually, I was loving it.

In one way, Crow was worse than Bones. He actually made me want to stay. He gave me a beautiful place to live with the freedom to venture outside. He respected my privacy and never forced me to do anything I didn’t want to do. He made me feel safe when I shouldn’t feel safe at all. And that made me not want to leave.

So he was much more dangerous.

Now I really hated him.

I hated his arrogance. I hated his intelligence. I hated his ruthlessness. This was just a sick game to him. He wanted to best me because he got off on it. He was the dominant one in the relationship, and he relished every time I submitted.

I despised him.

He stripped me of my weaponry and armor. I was vulnerable and open to attack. He somehow convinced me that this button deal was a good idea. He tricked me into opening my legs and giving him exactly what he wanted.

I fell right into his trap.

And I hated myself.

***

I avoided him like the plague.

When he was in the house, I made sure I was outside of it. He had a beautiful pool in his backyard, so I spent my time lounging in my bikini and sunglasses. Every time he came outside to speak to me, I slipped into the pool where he wouldn’t follow me.

When he had meals, I didn’t join him. Lars brought food to my room or wherever I was hiding. He seemed to understand I was avoiding his employer, but he never questioned me about it.

Crow usually wanted sex in the evening, so I made sure I was in the pool when that time came. It was far too late to be outside, but it was a better alternative than being under him.

I sat in the hot tub and rested my head on a rolled-up towel. I could see all the stars in the sky. They shined brighter here than they did in America, probably because we were far away from the city. I stared at them and tried to identify the different stars and planets. When I put my mind to a task, all other thoughts ceased. It was the only peace I could find.

“Mind if I join you?”

As always, I hadn’t heard him approach. I nearly jumped out of my skin at his question. I removed my head from the pillow and saw him standing there in sweat pants and a black t-shirt—the same thing he always wore. “I just want to be alone.”

“You’ve been alone all day.”

“And it wasn’t long enough.”

He didn’t venture closer. His hands rested in his pockets, and he looked across the fields. They were enveloped in darkness but still present nonetheless. The breeze moved through my hair, tickling the back of my neck as the moisture still clung to it.

I laid my head back and waited for him to walk away. He only came looking for me because he wanted sex. I refused to give it to him—not tonight. “Good night, Crow.”

Instead of leaving, he undressed himself and slipped into the hot tub beside me. “I’ve done something, haven’t I?”

I kept my eyes on the sky. “No. I just don’t like you.”

He chuckled. “It didn’t seem that way last night.”

I wanted to kick him in the nuts.

“Button.” His playfulness evaporated like the steam rising from the water. His voice held his command, telling me to obey.

I refused to.

He moved through the water until he was directly beside me, his hand moving to my thigh. His fingers slowly crept up to the apex of my thighs. My body tensed in preparation, immediately wanting him to rub my clit. But then logic returned, and I sat up straight. “What?”

He returned his hand to my thigh, keeping it at an appropriate distance. “Talk to me.”

“I won’t accept a button tonight. Go away.”

The disappointment didn’t emerge, and he pulled his hand away, understanding I couldn’t be seduced. “I’m not just your master. I’m your friend as well.”

“You aren’t my master.” Venom flew from my mouth along with drops of spit. “You don’t own me, and you never will.”

All patience and understanding ceased. It shattered inside him, leaving the ruthless man behind. “I. Own. You.” He grabbed my wrist and twisted it, holding it in an uncomfortable position. If he pushed any farther, he could break my arm.