Buttons & Hate (Buttons 2)

“Yes.”

“Where is this coming from?” Did Crow make him do this? I never talked about Cane when we were together. I didn’t even care to get an apology from him.

“Crow and I talked last night and...I realized I made a mistake.”

“What do you mean?”

“There’s an unspoken code between us. All women are free for interception. We’ve even shared a few before. And that applies to brutality. There’s no one we’re particularly loyal to, so they’re fair game. Unless one of us is in love.”

I held my breath, unsure if I heard him right.

“I didn’t realize how he felt about you because he never told me. And when I figured it out...I realized how much I fucked up. I just want you to know I never would have crossed that line if I’d known the line was there to begin with. My brother and I butt heads a lot, but that’s a sacred thing we don’t touch. If I loved a woman, he would teacher her like a goddamn queen.”

I still couldn’t breathe. I hard what he said but I couldn’t accept it. It was so unexpected. “He told you he loved me...?”

“Well, not exactly. But he made it pretty clear.”

“He did?”

“Yeah. Crow has never been in love before. Neither have I. So, it took me some time to figure it out.”

I finally took a breath, my chest aching after remaining still for so long. My heart kicked into overdrive and my palms grew sweaty. Everything in the room seemed brighter, more vibrant and beautiful.

“And I know you love him too. I tried to tell him that but he wouldn’t believe me.”

“Why not?”

He shrugged. “Not sure. Maybe he just didn’t want to talk about it. I don’t know. He’s still pissed at me for what I did so he’s not as open as he used to be. He’s always been a private guy but now he’s over the top. Annoying.”

I stared at the gun in my hand and felt my finger leave the trigger. Cane wasn’t here to hurt me so there was no point in holding the weapons. I set it on the cushion beside me.

“Anyway, I just wanted to say that. I know what I did was unforgiveable but maybe we can move forward and find a new beginning somewhere down the road. I promise I won’t hurt you again.”

Maybe it was foolish, but I believed him. “I think we can find some common ground.” If it were anyone else, I’d say no. But Cane was Crow’s last family member in the world. I’d rather make it work than place a wedge between them.

“Great.” He slapped his thighs before he stood up. “I can tell you’re good for him. You’re not emotional like most women.”

“Excuse me?” I stood up and put my hands on my hips. “Emotional?”

“Yeah. No woman would be able to let that go like you did. Women hold onto things and never forget. But you’re focused on moving forward. That’s how generals think. That’s how dictators think.”

“Well, I’m definitely not a dictator.”

“Give it time.” He winked before he walked to the front door. “Happy humping.” He turned toward the kitchen near the staircase. “See ya, Lars.” He waved before he walked out.

I grabbed the gun from the couch and prepared to return it to the bedroom.

Lars appeared, wearing his tuxedo like always. “Mr. Barsetti left?”

“Yep.” I held the gun at my side and ignited the safety.

“The two of you were able to work things out?”

I realized how crazy it sounded when someone else said it. “I guess so.”

“I know Cane’s behavior was unacceptable, but he truly is an honorable man.”

Somehow, I knew he was right. “I can tell.”

“They’ve both lost so many people. I used to be the family butler when his parents were still alive. Good people. And Vanessa...she was something special.” His eyes trailed to the floor and he released a sigh of heartbreak.

Hearing her name made me ache for someone I didn’t know. “I can tell it’s hard for him.”

“Those two were inseparable. I’d say Mr. Barsetti was closer to Vanessa than anyone else. When she passed away he never grieved. But I know that’s only because he’s so utterly heartbroken.”

“He’s pretty closed off.”

“I know.” He turned his gaze back to me. “He’s been much happier now. Haven’t seen him smile since he was a child.” He gave me a knowing look before he turned back to the kitchen. “And I think I know why.”

***

“Your master is home.” He walked into the bedroom like a king and removed his tie. His eyes weren’t exhausted from a long day at the office. In fact, they looked rejuvenated.

“And your slave has been waiting.” I’d never allowed him to call me that before, and I certainly never called myself that. But now the connotation didn’t seem offensive. I wanted to be owned by him—completely and utterly. I’d already given myself to him in the most profound way. Freedom knocked on my own door but I didn’t answer.