Buttons and Pain (Buttons 3)

It was the only thing I could get off to.

I convinced myself it was just about the sex. I’d never had good sex like that before so I didn’t have anything else to compare it to. It had nothing to do with the man, just the package that was included.

Jason stopped by my apartment that night with a pizza box in his hands. “I come with gifts.”

“Ooh…really good gifts.”

He came inside and set the box on the counter. “Did you have plans tonight?”

“Just a hot date with my TV.”

“Then it’s cool if I’m the third wheel tonight?”

“If you don’t mind being left out sometimes.”

He chuckled. “Not at all.”

We grabbed our beer and pizza and watched TV on the couch. Like always, he stayed far away from me. He purposely put unnecessary space between us. He continued to look at me like a rape victim, not a friend or woman he was attracted to.

I didn’t want that label. I didn’t want to be viewed that way. While those months in captivity were the worst of my life, they didn’t define who I was. I was still the same woman as when I left New York.

I just wish Jason would see me that way.

***

After a few beers and demolished pizza, I was loose and so was he. He wore his alumni college t-shirt, and it was tight against his muscular chest and shoulders. His dirty blonde hair was styled meticulously, and his handsome face was framed by a chiseled jaw and nice cheekbones.

I was attracted to him.

When we were together, I loved him. The breakup was hard for the first few months. I cried a lot. And when I found out he was seeing someone new, I felt dead inside. But as time went on it got easier. Then I finally got over him.

The sex was decent. Sometimes I would come. He was gentle with me, always making love to me and never taking me harshly.

I knew he was still attracted to me.

I was ready to get back on the horse and move on with my life. I needed a good lay and some affection. My body yearned to be touched. My skin craved kisses and mild bites. My thighs desperately wanted to squeezed a man’s hips. I wanted to get hot and sweaty and roll across my sheets. Crow undoubtedly had replaced me with some exotic, beautiful woman and he didn’t think about me anymore.

And I shouldn’t think about him.

I left my couch and took the seat beside him.

Jason immediately looked at me, surprised by the proximity. His hands stayed in his lap but his eyes glanced at the curve of my tits in my t-shirt. He quickly looked away like he was ashamed for looking at all.

He would never make the move so I did. I cupped his face then pressed my mouth to his. It immediately felt foreign. His lips were nothing like Crow’s. They were thicker and the scruff didn’t rub against my delicate skin. There wasn’t power in his touch. I didn’t feel the dominance course through him in powerful waves.

Once the initial shock wore off, Jason pulled me further into him and deepened the kiss. His strong arms wrapped around me and made me feel safe. It was so nice to feel the heat from a man’s body. It was a relief to feel needed and attractive.

I straddled his hips and pressed my tits against his chest as I sucked his bottom lip. My arms wrapped around his neck and I slowly grinded against his erection in his jeans. The definition was noticeable, but not thick like Crow’s. I already knew how Jason felt because I’d been with him hundreds of times. But I couldn’t stop myself from comparing him to Crow.

I unbuttoned his jeans and pulled down the zipper. His boxers were in the way I yanked them down so his cock could be free. My lips still moved against his and our tongues danced together. Then I pulled up my dress and moved my panties to the side.

Jason gripped my hips and pulled me back slightly. “Pearl, wait.” He was out of breath, his eyes dark with arousal. His face was flushed with heat and his cheeks were tinted. “I don’t think we should do this.” His fingertips kneaded into my ass. His hips grinded slightly, wanting to rub his shaft against my clit. His movements contradicted everything. “Maybe we should take things slow because…you’ve been through a lot.”

I was tired of him looking at me that way. I was a victim once in my life but that was in the past. I’d dealt with my problems and moved on. “Jason, I’m fine. Stop worrying about me. Now, do you want to fuck me or not?”

He closed his eyes and took a deep breath before he pointed his cock at my entrance. He gripped my hips and lowered me onto his length slowly, moaning from deep in his throat as he felt me.