Dump and Chase (Nashville Assassins Next Generation 1)

“But we love each other more now than ever. He’s seen that,” Mom tries. “I refuse to blame us for his commitment issues.”

“But it is our fault. Mine for not being there, and yours for being so jaded when it came to relationships,” Dad says slowly. “I love you, Fallon. I love you more than I can ever express, but we did this.”

Mom looks at me, and I swallow past the emotion in my throat. I don’t want to hurt her. I love her. My mom is perfection in my eyes. She gave me a great life before Dad came along. She loved me enough for both of them, along with Audrey’s help. They were great to me, and while it was a good change when Dad came along, I know my mom did her best.

“Are you in love with her?” she asks, and I shake my head.

“I don’t even know what love is.”

Dad holds out his hand to me. “Why is that?”

“’Cause I’ve never been with anyone to find out,” I answer, and when I see the tears gather in my mom’s eyes, I look away. “It’s not a big deal.”

“Aiden, it’s a huge deal. We don’t want that for you. You deserve to love someone. To be loved. Don’t let what happened to me hold you back.”

I look up, meeting her gaze. “That’s hard when I heard you cry. When I saw you try and try to find someone to fill that hole he left you with. You’d lie in bed with me, and I could see the pain on your face. You were never complete, never happy—”

“Aiden, you were the light of my life. I was always happy—”

“Yes, with me. But when it was just you, or even with AA, you were sad. You were bitter, you were angry, because all you wanted was the love of your life. You wanted the man who completed you. And I’m sorry, I can’t do that.”

“Can’t do what?” Dad asks, his hand slipping around my mom and scooting her beside him so he can hold her. “We are happy, Aiden. We are in love. This is a great life.”

“But it doesn’t erase the fact that she was miserable for a long time. Six years, to be exact. So you want me to just give in to that, feel that, and then have it go away?” Both of their faces are filled with such turmoil. “Don’t you remember, Mom? Not everyone gets a happily ever after, so why should I even chance it?”

Tears stream down my mom’s face, and I hate it. I didn’t want to make her cry. She gets up and comes around the table. I don’t move until she makes me, turning me in my chair before taking my face in her hand. “You chance it for this,” she says, gesturing around the room. “For a family. A home. A love that will last a lifetime. Yes, your father broke me, but he also put me back together. He gave me the best life I could ever ask for—”

“But I don’t want that pain,” I tell her.

She blinks as the tears fall down her cheeks, and then she slowly lowers to her knees, cupping my face in both her hands. “The truth is, punkin’, everybody can hurt you, but you gotta find the one worth hurting for. The one who may hurt you but will love you even harder. We’re human. We make mistakes. It happens.”

As I stare into her flooded green eyes, I find myself asking if Shelli is worth hurting for. I see her blue eyes, her quick grin, and I can feel her laugh in my soul.

Is she?

“Punkin’, I found mine, and then I lost him. Did I do things wrong? You’re damn right I did, but I was young, I was hurt, and I was mad. Dad and I both made bad choices, him with the drinking and me with keeping him away from you completely. I tried to stop myself from being hurt again, and I was miserable. I hurt him and he hurt me, but here we are. My heart belongs to him, and sometimes, if you’re lucky, that’s how it is. You find the one you belong to, the one you were made for, and that’s it.”

I swallow hard as I get lost in her loving eyes. “I don’t want to get hurt.”

She holds my face. “But is the fear of hurt enough to keep you from feeling complete?”

I look down at my hands as I absorb everything they are saying. “I hear you guys, but I honestly don’t know what to say. I don’t know what I’m feeling.”

“Is it serious? You and Shelli?”

I swallow past the lump in my throat. “I don’t… I think so. I miss her, a lot, and I love being with her.”