Wrecking Ball (Hard to Love 1)

A double cough comes from the end of the hallway. Cal flinches. He pulls away, but doesn’t let me go.

“Yes?” Could he make his annoyance any clearer? That’s a hard no.

“Dinner’s ready,” Amanda announces. I bite the inside of my cheek as I watch his eyes narrow.

“Give us a minute,” he snaps.

“Okay––we’ll wait for you,” she replies, her tone instantly apologetic.

As soon as her soft footsteps fade away, he leans in and places a gentle kiss on my neck. Trying to push him off gets me nowhere.

“Did you think about it?”

“I can’t.”

He presses his hips into me again and I gasp, my eyes practically rolling to the back of my head.

“Yes, you can. We’ll discuss it later.”

“No, Calvin––” He pushes off the wall and is down the hall, headed to the kitchen, before I can get another word in.

Amanda has cooked a remarkably juicy roast chicken. I can tell she’s nervous so I make a big deal about complimenting the food. It seems to relax her a little. Her eyes are constantly jumping between Sam and Calvin, measuring their responses. Cal is quiet throughout dinner. He’s back to communicating in grunts and nods.

“The couscous is delicious Amanda. The blonde raisins give it a nice flavor.”

“Thanks,” she says, her eyes still on Sam.

“Isn’t this food delicious, Sam?”

“I guess,” is his surly reply. He’s been doing a lot of that the last couple of days, wavering between wanting to be nice and remembering how angry he is at her.

“I’d love to have you all over at my parents for dinner before you leave.”

At this, Calvin glances up. “There won’t be time.”

The words come flying out sharp and quick. Everyone at the table not named Calvin is kind of taken aback. I don’t see what the problem is? He likes my parents, I know he does. And they couldn’t love him more, not to mention how crazy they are about Sam. “Why not?”

“Because they’re leaving day after tomorrow.”

Christ, he’s being a dick. What’s his deal tonight? And then I remember he’s playing tomorrow, so I cut him some slack and drop the glare I’m wearing.

“I was thinking we could hang out for another week,” Amanda offers casually.

“No.” He practically shouts. Now we all turn to stare in his direction. “Sam has to get back to school. He’s already gonna miss a few days.” Cal’s flat out glowering.

Amanda’s gaze falls to the food she’s dissecting into tiny pieces just like her brother does. “Yeah, you’re right,” she agrees in a small voice.

As soon as we’re done, Calvin disappears into his office to go over game tape of Arizona. I insist on washing the dishes since Amanda cooked. With a little encouragement, she and Sam go upstairs to watch tv.

Two hours later, I’m getting out of the shower when a I hear a soft knock at the door. Throwing on my cotton robe, I prepare to deal with my visitor.

“Now is not a good time, Cal.” I rip open the door to find Amanda standing there.

“Not Calvin,” she says, her lips briefly curving up.

Aaaand my face goes up in flames. “Is everything okay?”

“Can I come in for a minute?”

What is it with these Shaws and their late night visits? “Sure,” I say even though I’m kind of uneasy about it; I make a point to leave the door open.

“It won’t take long. I just want to thank you for everything you’ve done for Sam…for me.” She glides in, taking in the room. “I stayed in this room when Kim was still around.” Kim’s name ignites a spark of serious irritation. The last thing I want to do at this hour, or any hour for that matter, is hear about Calvin’s ex-wife.

“You don’t have to thank me. I love Sam. He’s absolutely wonderful…You’re very lucky.” That last bit was meant to remind her she’s responsible for a life. God knows, I envy her.

“Camilla…there’s something else I need to say.” Turning, she meets my gaze squarely. “There’s only one person that’s as precious to me as Sam is, and that’s Calvin.” I’m not surprised. By the way, she’s been watching us since she got here, it was only a matter of time. “What happened with Kim almost destroyed him. I don’t know what your intensions are, but I know my brother and he’s rarely interested in someone. If this is anything other than mutual, then be warned. I don’t respond well to him being hurt.”

I could go on a long monologue about how I would never hurt anyone, let alone someone I love. I could…but I don’t.

“No need to worry. I’m moving out day after tomorrow, and the only thing between your brother and me is friendship. I want children. I always have. And after spending so much time with Sam, I couldn’t be any more certain of it. Like I said, you’re very lucky. Your brother doesn’t want a family. He’s made it abundantly clear––end of story.” She’s taken aback at my directness. Mission accomplished. Awkwardness hangs in the silence. “If you don’t mind, I’m exhausted.”