Pure Sin (Privilege 5)

What are you doing right now, Reed? Ariana wondered, gritting her teeth as she stared down at the smudged photo in the newspaper, which was tucked inside her government text. What are you doing right now? Are you having brunch with your friends? Is Noelle there? Are you still dating that Boy Scout Josh Hollis? What are you thinking? Do you ever even think about me? About what you did to me? About where I am right now, because of you?

Someone dropped a heavy book on the other side of the stacks, and the slam brought Ariana back to the present. She heard someone curse under their breath as she looked around at the brightly lit Atherton-Pryce Hall library. The room was warm, thanks to a charming wood-burning fireplace in the corner, around which several students were gathered in plush chairs, their books splayed open across their laps. The sun streamed in through the skylights overhead, casting its beams along the spines of the classic, leather-bound books all around her. Ariana took a deep breath and sighed. Where she was right now actually wasn’t that bad. Not bad at all.

It was what she was dealing with that scared her. She looked up, across the three tables that separated her from Lexa. This morning Lexa appeared to be just fine, all cuddled into her white turtleneck sweater, poring over her history text with Conrad. Every now and then, Conrad would run his hand over her hair and look at her with concern, whisper something in her ear, kiss her cheek. He was taking care of her, which was a plus. But Conrad had no idea exactly what he was dealing with—nor did Ariana want him to find out.

Lexa was dangling precariously over the edge of the deep end. The slightest mishap could push her in at any moment, and the splash would take out not only her, but Ariana as well. After what had happened the night be

fore, Ariana knew what she had to do. She had to stick to Lexa like glue. She had to make sure that she stopped any future budding breakdowns before they could truly blossom. Otherwise, she was going to have to do something drastic. Something she didn’t even want to think about.

“Hey. There you are.”

Suddenly Palmer’s arms enveloped her from behind. She slammed her government book closed over the newspaper, her pulse suddenly fluttering at an alarming rate. If Palmer had noticed that she was staring at an old sports section featuring girls’ soccer, he was definitely going to ask her about it. What was she supposed to say? I’ve suddenly developed an interest in women’s sports?

Palmer gave her a kiss on the cheek and lowered herself into the chair next to hers. His eyes flicked to Lexa and Conrad, and he gave Connie a nod.

“So. How’s she been?” he asked Ariana.

Taking a deep breath, Ariana laid her government book aside, relieved, at least, that Reed wasn’t about to become a topic of conversation.

“Okay. Fine,” she said brightly. “They’ve been over there since before I arrived and not a peep.”

“Good. That’s good,” Palmer said. Still, he kept his gaze on Lexa, as if he was mulling something over. Deciding whether or not to try to have her removed as president, perhaps? The very idea made Ariana sick to her stomach. Lexa loved being president of Stone and Grave. Having that taken away from her would only make her condition worse.

Not to mention that Ariana would never be able to exert her power over Lexa to get things done the way she wanted.

“You know, I was thinking about it last night and I realized . . . Lexa’s actually been acting weird all semester,” Palmer said, placing his elbows on the table. He turned toward Ariana and rested his cheek on his fist, as if trying to hide his words from the girl who was yards away.

“Really? How?” Ariana asked, preparing herself to refute anything he said.

“Well, first there was the cheating during welcome week,” Palmer said. “That was not her style.”

Ariana shifted uncomfortably in her seat. Lexa hadn’t had anything to do with the cheating. Ariana had sabotaged one of the other boats for the crew race—and let Palmer blame it on Lexa.

“And then there was that whole thing with Lillian,” Palmer continued.

Now Ariana’s heart shifted into overdrive. “What whole thing with Lillian?”

“They way she just let Lillian in? Invited her to Stone and Grave?” Palmer said, lifting a shoulder. “We all told her she had to vet the girl, but she was all ‘Lillian’s good people. I like her. Case closed.’ It wasn’t until later when all the questions were raised about her that Lexa finally started to listen. And then, Lily up and disappears. I mean, how weird is that?”

Ariana forced herself to breathe slowly. Tried to figure out exactly how she was supposed to react to all of this—how a person who knew nothing about any of it would react.

“Well . . . Lillian leaving school . . . that had nothing to do with Lexa,” Ariana said.

Palmer looked at her and narrowed his eyes. It was almost as if he was studying her. Almost as if he was thinking that Lillian’s disappearance had something to do with . . . her.

“And then there’s you,” he said.

Ariana’s heart stopped beating in her chest. Her mouth went dry, and she reached for her bottle of water, her mind racing. It was never good when people started to ask questions—when they started to really think about what was going on around them, trying to see the big picture. Clearly that was what Palmer was doing now. But how close was he to the truth? Did he really suspect Ariana, or was he just fishing?

“What do you mean, then there’s me?” she asked slowly.

“Well, last year everything was normal. So I was trying to figure out what’s different and then I realized . . . you are. You show up on campus and suddenly there’s all this . . . drama,” Palmer said, sitting back in his chair. “Are you a bringer of drama, Ana Covington?” he said, half-teasing, half-serious.

“Adam’s new this year too,” Ariana snapped. “Have you tracked him down and blamed him yet?”

Palmer blinked, surprised. “Sorry. I was just kidding,” he said. “Thinking out loud.”

Ariana clutched her water bottle. She stared at one little drop as it wound its way down from the mouth of the bottle and into the pool of untouched water at the bottom.