The Doctor Who Has No Ambition (Soulless 9)

“Yeah…I’m fine.”

He remained close to me, his eyes shifting back and forth like he didn’t believe the bold lie I’d just told. He was patient, as if he knew I would start talking if he just waited long enough.

I inhaled a deep breath, and that’s when the tears started. “She called me last night…” The tears were there instantaneously, like they’d already been formed in the back of my eyes and we were waiting for the chance to fall. “And…I didn’t know what to say.” I started to sob, like I was the one who’d lost my husband, my hand covering my mouth so he wouldn’t see the way my lips trembled uncontrollably.

He seemed to figure out exactly what I was talking about without having to ask a single question. His arms moved around me, and he immediately held me against him, his large hand spanning my back as he cradled me toward him, letting me press my wet cheek against his t-shirt. “Hey,” he whispered. “It’s going to be alright.”

I latched on to him, feeling his hard body support me like a solid wall rather than a human body. I closed my eyes and sniffled as my wet mascara and eyeliner soaked into his shirt. I let myself cry, let myself grieve for my involvement in the most despicable thing I’d ever done.

“Shh…” He rubbed my back gently as he supported me, showed no discomfort at my wet tears staining his clothes, no impatience that I needed to have a good cry right in the hallway where a client could walk by. My behavior was unprofessional, but he didn’t seem to care at all. All he seemed to care about was me.

“I feel…so terrible.”

“I know you do. Because you’re a good person who cares about other people.”

I sniffed loudly. “I’m not a good person…” I’d slept with a married man, a man with a family, a man who was loved by a woman with all her heart. “I shouldn’t have hit on him when I saw him at the airport. It’s all my fault…”

“No.” He pulled away slightly so he could look into my face, his powerful arms still warm around my body. “He was the one who was married. He was the one who should have said no. He was the one who should have honored his commitment to his marriage, whether he was happy in that marriage or not. His behavior is inexcusable—and not at all your responsibility.”

“I-I didn’t know he was married. He wasn’t wearing a ring.”

“A man shouldn’t get married if he’s not going to wear his wedding ring every moment of the day, whether that’s in the shower or when he sleeps, let alone out of the house. He obviously had bad intentions from the beginning. You’re as much of a victim in this as his wife. So, don’t carry the grief, the pain, and the responsibility for someone else’s crime. You don’t deserve it.”

The sincerity in his voice and the serious look in his eyes made me feel better, somehow. I gave a slight nod and took a deep breath, doing my best to stop the tears before they really destroyed my makeup. “I’m sorry. It’s just been eating me alive since last night.”

“Don’t be sorry.” He reached into his pocket and pulled out a tissue and handed it to me. “It’s good to get it out sometimes.”

I took it and dabbed at my face. “She was just so devastated. I could hear it in her voice…”

“He doesn’t deserve her. He has a woman who loves him so much, and he takes it for granted. Worthless.”

I did my best to fix my makeup, to wipe up the darkness that was probably bleeding under my eyes.

“When you knew the truth, you ended it. You did the right thing.”

“I feel so stupid. I feel stupid that I trusted him, that I took part in an act that broke someone’s heart. I’m so sick of men who won’t hesitate to cheat the second the opportunity presents itself. It’s just… What’s the point?” It was the second time I’d been cheated on, but this was worse than the first time because I was the other woman this time.

“Not all men are like that,” he said gently. “I know good men who would never do that, even if there was absolutely no chance of getting caught. I know men who would do anything and everything just to make their wife smile. I’m sorry this happened to you, but we aren’t all like that.”

“But men like that don’t last long. Good men are snatched up quick, and women never let them go.” That was what I would do if I ever found a man like that. I would never take him for granted.

He watched me clean up my makeup for a long time. “You would think…but sometimes women can be worse than men.”