But I Need You (This Love Hurts 2)

And she kissed him back.

I know she wanted him to for a long while. She wanted his lips on hers. She wanted more than that.

I imagine tonight he’ll lean in for a kiss but I’m uncertain if she’ll allow it. Since I kissed her last. I wonder which kiss she enjoys more.

Honk, honk, the man I saw just a moment ago waves me down from the other side of the street. He’s heading the other direction now, the front end of his car parallel to mine and his window rolled down.

With jet-black hair speckled white and wrinkles lining his eyes, he narrows his gaze at me, a harsh crease in his forehead emphasizing his wrinkles.

A smirk is my response as he motions for me to roll down my window. I do and immediately ask him, “You lost?”

“No, no, I thought you might be?” he says with a half grin but skepticism still lingering in his gaze. I’ve dealt with many men like him, so not an ounce of nervousness trickles through. They’re all the same.

I imagine he’s retired, the grandfather of one of the youths who play in these fenced-in backyards. I wonder if he thinks he knows everyone on this street. Maybe he does.

“Not lost,” I say as I shake my head and switch the tab on my screen to the work order scheduled at 47 Lewisville Drive. “I’m just waiting on the Jenkinses for their appointment.”

The Jenkins family has an appointment, but not with me. Before they arrive, I’ll be gone. I’m not interested in their home in the least. This street, however, is one of my favorites for the view I needed tonight. From this exact spot, I can easily see through the back windows of the Italian restaurant a mile down the road, using the camera in my dashboard. Technology has made what I do substantially easier to keep tabs on certain men.

This man is right to be suspicious, but this street will never be harmed. It’s far too valuable to me.

“I’m hoping they’ll be home soon although I’m early. I got done with my last appointment a little early and …” I don’t finish the statement; instead I hold up a half-eaten sandwich.

“Right, right,” he says and the grin on his face widens, acknowledging my lies with understanding. He seems to be a good man. One who’d fill me in if ever I needed to know anything about this street. I wouldn’t even have to pry for him to confide in me. Men like him are proud to keep an eye out and protect the neighborhood. They’re the ones who take it the hardest when something … unfortunate occurs.

I call men like him the birds. They watch, they swoop down to be heroes, but they are so limited when it comes to putting down the dogs.

It’s only once the man, who told me his name is Dave, has driven off do I click over to my tabs on the laptop. First checking the cameras and waiting for Ross Brass to make his entrance. He’s a no-show at the moment, but given who he’s meeting, I’m certain he’ll arrive any moment now.

In the meantime, I read the texts between Cody and Delilah.

I need to see you. Cody’s been relentless. I can’t blame him. He’s worried and for good reason. I haven’t responded to the messages he’s sent me. I’m sure that’s caused some unfortunate thoughts to enter his mind.

I never thought I’d hear you say that. I can practically hear her voice hum the somewhat flirtatious response.

Please, tonight.

It must be more than jealousy that I feel when she gives in. Perhaps … it’s obsession. Although from what I know of that shortcoming, it often comes with anger. And there’s not a bit of it at the thought of her loving Cody. She has such a big heart. I’ve seen her love a monster before. She could love me too. I know she can. But it would be so much easier to love Cody.

The faint sounds of chairs scraping and men with thick accents greeting each other force me to click over to the other screen. It’s already recording but still, I watch and wait. These strings are more important to pull than the ones of lovers.

Delilah

It’s easier to pretend like it didn’t happen than to face the reality. Every other minute, those piercing blue eyes penetrate my every thought and remind me that I saw him again, kissed him again, and was dying for it like I had before. Not only that, but so much more transpired.

And I enjoyed it. I wanted more.

I could lie like an expert witness on the stand and tell myself it was for answers, but the crackle I felt between us, the dose of lust and shot of heat can’t be ignored. There’s something fucked up in my head. It’s wrong and I’m aware, but I can’t change it, no matter how much I lie to myself.