Capturing Peace (Sharing You 0.50)
“See you soon.”
I pressed the END button, put the car in park and turned it off before climbing out of it. Knowing Reagan was about to see what I’d given up my career to do, I couldn’t stop smiling as I got everything ready for the shoot. My client arrived a handful of minutes later, and after talking more about what he wanted and throwing around some ideas, we started. I tried not to think about the fact that Reagan should have been there ten minutes before. Turning music on as loud as it would go and putting my phone on vibrate so I would know if she called, I tried to focus on my client and what we were going for with this shoot, and not where my mind was wandering to.
By the time the hour-long shoot ended, I was irritated and worried, and had this annoying feeling crawling up the back of my neck. I was trying not to snap at my client and wondering how I’d managed not to break my phone yet.
Reagan hadn’t shown, and she hadn’t called.
After he left, I flipped through the pictures and was glad I’d somehow managed to get more than enough shots that were perfect for what he wanted, but I felt bad that my client had had to put up with me. As I went through more pictures, I suddenly realized what the annoying feeling was that I’d been having, and my body stilled. Someone was watching me . . . but even as I realized it, I didn’t turn around. I knew it was her. I didn’t know how I knew, I just did.
“Can I help you?” I asked, never looking up from my camera.
“Get anything good?” Her voice was soft and gentle. Like she didn’t care at all that I’d been flipping out for the last hour.
“You c
ould have called.”
“Why would I have done that?”
I lowered my hands and lifted my head at the same time and just stared, seeing nothing, for a few seconds before turning to look at her. “Are you fucking kidding me? I thought you were coming here and you didn’t show!”
“I’m here aren’t I?” The knowing grin never left her face. “You said you always get your way . . . I had to make sure you didn’t this time. Besides, if you really wanted to know if I was coming or not, you could have called me.”
Setting my camera down, I began stalking toward her. “I can’t just stop a shoot so I can check up on you. You told me you’d be here, I trusted you were coming. Reagan, I’ve been going out of my mind wondering where you were. I didn’t know if you’d gotten in a wreck, if you just decided not to come . . . a thousand possibilities were running through my mind. I was acting like a dick to my client because of you, do you realize that?”
Her smile faltered. “I’m sorry you were worried, honestly I was just waiting for you to turn around . . . and right now, Coen, I’m just playing with you. I’ve been here for almost an hour, but because you didn’t notice me until just now . . . I thought I could tease you about it.”
“Don’t try to—”
“I’m serious! Call that guy and ask him! I walked in when he was changing into his red shirt, and we waved at each other! I just didn’t want to bother you during your shoot, so I waited back here and watched; I’m sorry you got that worried, I didn’t know. I kept thinking you would turn around, Coen, I swear to God.”
My breathing was ragged, and at some point I’d pinned her up against the back wall. My head understood that she was safe, I could see her, smell her, feel her chest pressed against mine. But my body was still shaking from the amount of adrenaline I had coursing through my veins at the thought of something happening to her, and then her playing me.
Dropping my head, I shook it to the side once and whispered gruffly, “What are you doing to me, Reagan?”
“I don’t know wh—I’m sor—do you want me to leave?”
“No, I don’t want you to leave. I want to know why you’re consuming me this way. I want to know why you’re all I can think about. Why the thought of something happening to you, or you standing me up, can completely ruin me like this. I want to know what it is about you that has me so fucking turned around for the first time in my life.”
She touched the side of my face and put pressure there until I looked back to her, and when she spoke, her voice was soft and filled with wonder. “I’ve avoided men for six and a half years, Coen . . . what is it about you that has me anxiously waiting for a chance to be near you again?”
I pressed my body closer to hers and dropped my forehead onto hers.
“Everything about you scares me,” she admitted quietly.
I ground my jaw and mentally cursed myself for letting her see me frustrated just then. “I didn’t mean to scare you, Reagan.”
“Don’t. You know you and your demons don’t scare me.” She shook her head slowly. “What you can do to me . . . what you can do to Parker. What letting you into our lives can do to us . . . that is what scares me. You have the power to ruin him, Coen, and knowing that makes me want to grab Parker and run.”
“Or maybe I’ll surprise you,” I whispered against her lips. Interlocking our fingers, I raised our hands above our heads and pressed them against the wall. “I respect you for what you’ve done for him. I respect you for being scared for your son. But I know that if you let me in, I’m getting you and Parker . . . not just you.”
Reagan’s eyes met and held mine, and I moved both her hands into one of mine and brought my free hand to cup her cheek.
“When I met you, I already knew what you came with. I don’t want to see what I can get from you only on nights when your son is gone, Reagan. I want to see what we can be together, and I know that includes your son getting to know me.”
“I’ve never introduced a guy to him,” she confessed after a few silent seconds, and I smiled.
“Technically, you’ve already introduced us, and we already know he likes me.” Reagan’s eyes narrowed and I brushed my lips across her nose. “You’ve also never had a guy pursuing you who wasn’t afraid of your walls or the fact that you have a son.”