The Crush
“Not much. Just checking in on you.”
“I’m still alive.”
“I know. Figured I’d see if you needed anything.”
“Shawn Mendes tickets,” she said.
That made me chuckle. “I meant like something to eat. But is he coming to town?”
“Yeah. I want to see him. I’m desperate.”
I sat down at the table next to her. “Will your mom buy you tickets?”
“She says she doesn’t have the money.”
“Maybe I can ask around and see if I can find affordable tickets.”
To my surprise, she started to cry. “Oh my God. That would be awesome.”
I’d nearly forgotten what it was like to be a lovesick child. Oh wait.
She sniffled. “I forgot to tell you, I saw you in the pool the other day with Jace.”
Speaking of lovesick…
“I heard splashing, and I looked out the window and could see you.”
I nodded. “Yeah…Jace and I were swimming.”
“Do you like him?”
I didn’t know how to answer. “You know Jace is like an older brother to me, right? He’s Nathan’s best friend… But…” I hesitated. Am I really considering telling an eleven-year-old my dirtiest secret? “Between you and me, I have a crush on him.”
Her eyes were like saucers. “He’s handsome.”
“Yeah. He is.”
“Not as cute as Shawn, though. Do you think he likes you?”
“You know…before the other day, I would’ve told you no. But I kind of got this vibe from him when we were hanging out. So, let’s put it this way… If he does like me, I don’t think he wants to like me. It’s kind of depressing because I don’t think anything can ever happen between us.”
Okay, that was definitely way too much to be divulging to a kid.
She sighed. “That’s like me and Shawn. I love him, but nothing can ever happen because he’s a huge star. At least Jace knows you exist.”
“I guess that could be a consolation.” I laughed before becoming paranoid. “Please don’t ever mention to anyone what I just told you, okay? It’s a secret.”
“I won’t say anything.”
“Okay. I’m choosing to trust you.” I smiled.
She returned to writing on her worksheet before turning to me again. “Why do you come over and check on me all the time?”
Shrugging, I sighed. “I guess I can relate to the feeling of being alone. I know I like it when people check in on me, so I figured I would do the same for you.”
“I’m sorry your mom isn’t here. I mean, I’m sorry she died. Your dad, too.”
Momentary sadness washed over me. “Thank you.”
“It was an accident, right? My mom told me.”
“Yeah. Sort of. I don’t really like to talk about it, though, okay?”
Her mouth twisted. “Okay. I wouldn’t want to talk about it, either.”
After some silence, I asked, “Are you sure you don’t want anything? I could make you a sandwich.”
“Nope. I have a Coke in the fridge and some Sour Patch Kids. I’m good.”
“Well, you may be good, but your teeth might think otherwise.”
“I do have a cavity.”
I raised my forehead. “You don’t say…”
I hung around for about fifteen minutes before getting ready to go back home. “Okay, well, if you need me, you have my number. Just ring me, and I can be over in thirty seconds.”
“Literally thirty seconds. How cool is that?” She giggled.
“Yup. Literally.”
“Good luck with Jace!” she shouted as I headed out the door.
Turning around, I placed my index finger over my mouth. “Shh... Remember what I said. Forget I told you about that.”
“Sorry,” she whispered.
I must have needed my head examined for telling a child about my feelings for Jace.
When I returned home, ironically, Jace’s truck was in the driveway. Just like the other day when we’d hung out in the pool, he’d come home from work early.
A rush of excitement hit me, until I entered the house and noticed a pair of women’s shoes under the small table in the foyer. I heard muffled laughter coming from Jace’s bedroom at the far end of the hall.
My cheeks burned.
He brought a girl home in the middle of the day?
He’d never done that before.
Not only was I extremely jealous, but I felt like a complete idiot. Ever since our jaunt in the pool and our brief yoga session, I’d been so excited for the next opportunity to be alone with him. I’d convinced myself that maybe he’d felt something when he held me in his arms for those few moments. God, I’m such a fool.
No way could I stay at the house this afternoon. And he knew I got home from work around this time, so he didn’t even have the decency to sneak her over here when the house would be empty. Why the hell wasn’t he working, anyway?
I found my keys and walked back out to my piece-of-shit car. This pissed me off because I was trying to save on gas, and now I’d have to drive somewhere just to get the hell out of here. I started the ignition—or tried to, at least. My crappy vehicle had other ideas. It wouldn’t start. I kept trying, to no avail. To make matters worse, my car was right outside Jace’s bedroom window. So I knew he could hear me trying to start it.