Opaque Melodies (Coveting Delirium 1)

I stared in confusion.

“You just suggested you willingly leave your house to go meet not just a human being, but a man.”

“Isn’t a man also a human being?”

“That’s debatable.”

“Chloe,” I reprimanded mockingly.

“Look, the point I’m trying to make is that you suggested this on your own. Not because your mom pushed a Voo-doo pin in your ass.”

“While accurate, that assessment doesn’t help me in any way. Would you go?”

“Yes, but this isn’t about me. It’s about you. Do you want to meet her husband?”

“No, but like you just said, this isn’t about him or me. It’s about my sister. I feel it’s the right thing to do given the circumstance.”

She pursed her lips, looking thoughtful for a moment. “If you feel like it’s the right, then go. Just don’t guilt trip your way into something you can’t handle.”

That was a rather nice way of saying, “Don’t do something that will push you over the edge again.”

Chloe was one of the rare individuals who’d seen me at my absolute worst. She’d gotten a glimpse of the all the execrable things I kept locked in a tight little box.

Instead of running for cover like any other sane woman would, she’d stuck by me and pushed me to overcome it, proving she was someone I could rely on. She wasn’t one of those people who disappeared when your life went to shit.

“I’ve been feeling fine. I haven’t had any blackouts or time lapses. Look, I’ve even kept up with my hair.” I ran my hands over the ombre ends for emphasizing.

From the way she observed me, her perfectly plucked brows drawn tight, I knew my words did little to ease her concerns. I couldn’t be upset about that when she knew exactly how bad I could get.

My mind had two variations. Some days it burned bright and I was a ball of positivity. Other days the light was completely extinguished, leaving me with nothing but a heavy darkness and thoughts better left unspoken if I didn’t want to wind up in a strait jacket.

“Okay!” Chloe exclaimed suddenly, clapping her hands together. “Come sit, let’s do some research.” She patted the sofa cushion beside her.

“What kind of research?”

“On your mysterious brother-in-law.”

I snagged my phone from the island and meandered over to the couch, sitting where she’d instructed.

“What’s his name?”

“Alaric Sch-yu-ler,” I sounded out, probably butchering his surname.

Chloe nodded once, then her fingers were flying over her screen. “Does he live in Oregon, Cali, or South Dakota?”

“Cali.”

Her lips pursing again, she grew quiet as she scrolled. I leaned over trying to see what she was doing, getting swatted away. After another minute, her doe-brown eyes met mine.

“What do you think this guy looks like?”

“Knowing what I do about my sperm donor and how he raised Meg. Older. Grey at the edges. Wealthy,” I tossed out a few adjectives.

“If this is the right dude then you’re not wrong.” She dimmed her screen without bothering to show me. It didn’t matter. His looks held no relevance to the situation. I wasn’t too concerned about his vanity.

Chloe kicked her heels off and pulled her legs up onto the couch, tucking them beneath her bottom.

“Are you sure you’re okay?”

“I think so.” I glanced down at my area rug, focusing on the swirled pattern. “She wrote me so many times and I never replied. I opened her messages and…left her on read.”

Clearing my throat, I rubbed the back of my neck and rolled my shoulders. I’d never been one for having deep conversations. They made me uncomfortable.

“Look, I know that sucks, but you can’t change anything by feeling guilty now. Megs gone. All you can do is carry on.”

Gone.

There was so much finality in that four-letter word.

But she was right. Trying to figure out how I could have made this better wouldn’t undo the unchangeable. I looked over at her with a half-smile.

“Thanks for always being the voice of reason.”

“Don’t call me that. You and me both know that I’ve made more than my fair share of shitty choices. I’m speaking from experience, so you don’t do the same.”

My phone chirped and vibrated, the screen lighting up. I glanced down at the preview box seeing a new text from Mom.

Everything’s been handled.

I read the text three times, a swirl of emotions beginning to unfurl in my gut.

“What’s wrong?” Chloe asked, peering at my screen just before it blacked out. “What does that mean?”

“It means my mom did the one thing I asked her not to. She made the decision for me.”

With a dramatic groan, Chloe leaned back and stared up at the ceiling.

CHAPTER TWO

I couldn’t believe I’d come this far.

Two days ago, I had spoken to the brother-in-law I forgot existed, about a sister I rarely claimed.

Fast forward past a sleuth of anxious jitters, lecturing from my overdramatic mother, and a five-hour non-stop flight--here I was.