Fish & Chips (Cut & Run 3)

“It"s a good thing you"re pretty or you"d never get laid.”

“Pretty?” Zane echoed in surprise. Ty merely laughed, the wide smile highlighting the laugh lines around his eyes and mouth, lines Zane saw all too rarely. He shook his head and said, “I have never in my life been called „pretty". And come to think of it, I don"t think I"ve ever had to use a come-on line, either.”

“The latter is because you"re pretty,” Ty claimed with a huff of air that brushed Zane"s cheek. Zane had to chuckle as he bowed his head. It was just too silly to think of himself that way, with a twice-broken nose healed a little crooked, wrinkles at the corners of his eyes, and a hell of a lot of scars. Ty turned his head and pressed a kiss to Zane"s cheek, and then he put both hands on Zane"s chest and pushed him away. “Let"s get those bags straightened out. I want to see how many weapons they managed to slip in with us.”

Zane reluctantly let go and followed him over to the ridiculous round bed. Choosing one of the suitcases, he picked up a heavy, zipped dopp kit. “I"m almost afraid to look,” Zane murmured before opening it. It was an old-fashioned shaving kit with a marble bowl, horsehair brush, and two straight-edge razors. Among other toiletries, there were also two long whetstones with elastic around them, and when Zane turned them over, he found one of his knives strapped to each heavy stone. “Resourceful,” he said with a raised brow. “Although I"m not sure how I"ll wear them with walking shorts and a polo.”

Ty glanced over to see what Zane was doing and nodded when he looked at the shaving kit. “Hopefully they got more than just your pig stickers in,” he muttered as he poked his finger through one of the neatly packed suitcases. “What the hell are walking shorts? You"re such a geek, man. I guess we can use the straight-edge razors if we want to make a horror show of it.”

He pulled out a plain leather toiletry bag and unzipped it, peering in for a second before merely letting it go.

It dropped to the mattress with a clatter of its contents as Ty stood frozen, his head turned away, eyes closed, his hands still out in front of him like he might be traumatized.

Zane glanced up, and when he saw the mess, he choked on a laugh. “Ah….” He cleared his throat as he looked at the variety of sex toys spilled across the duvet: three different dildos, a set of metal c**k rings, a scattering of clamps, a bottle of toy cleaner, a few silk scarves, and a couple of long boxes with clasps. He picked one of the boxes up and opened it. Inside was an implement even Zane wasn"t familiar with displayed on a slide of velvet. When he pulled up the small board, Zane found pieces of a disassembled gun inside.

“Like I said,” Zane continued, though now he was trying not to laugh, “resourceful. I wonder who laughed their asses off while packing this up.”

“That"s my gun,” Ty said in an offended voice. “They hid my gun in the sex toys? That"s not right, man.” He shook his head and continued muttering to himself as he began pulling out pieces of clothing and toiletries, carefully examining them for anything else that might have been hidden for them.

“Good hiding place, if you ask me,” Zane said as he picked up a jeweled dog collar and glanced toward Ty"s neck, visually estimating the possibility of a fit and deciding it just wouldn"t look right. “What security guy is going to take apart a vibrator to check for a slide barrel?”

Ty didn"t respond, merely looking askance at the collar and the appraising look in Zane"s eyes. He snorted at him and then pulled another small bag toward him, Del"s designer satchel, unzipping it with a hint of dread. He looked in warily, like more rubber dongs might jump out at him, but then dumped the contents onto the bed. There was an iPod, a set of headphones, a few puzzle books, two ear wigs, and three wireless listening devices. Ty looked up at Zane and shrugged.

“My question would be „are they theirs or ours?",” Zane said as he opened a small drawstring bag and looked down into it. After a moment, he simply pulled the strings to close it and dropped it on the bed. The fabric didn"t muffle the soft clinking noise.

“What"s that?” Ty asked as he nodded at the bag.

Zane picked the bag back up and pulled out a set of heavy-duty handcuffs. “These may be useful if I can"t get you to sit still,” he said, dangling them on one finger.

Ty shook his head and pointed one long finger at Zane warningly.

“You try it and I"ll freak out,” he said seriously.

“Freak out?” Zane asked, brow furrowing. “Why?” He didn"t think he"d ever seen Ty tied up, except for when Zane had found him in that dark catacomb in New York City, almost suffocated…. “Oh.

Okay.” He dropped the cuffs back into the bag and tossed it aside.

Ty pressed his lips tightly together and looked down at the bag again. “Maybe we can use them if we make an arrest,” he finally decided wryly before pulling more clothing out of the suitcase. There was a small stack of briefs and soft T-shirts, and he set them aside, in front of Zane. They"d been allowed to bring their own underwear, at least.

“I"ve not really thought about buying stuff like this,” Zane said slowly, dropping another small box labeled Vacheron Constantin after opening it and finding a very expensive watch. Other boxes held cuff links, old-fashioned tie clips, and various other high-dollar accouterments.

“On our salary, you can"t afford to look at stuff like this.” Ty licked his lips and looked over at Zane with a frown. “These guys are way out of my league,” he declared as he looked back down at everything they"d spread across the bed.

Zane turned and sat down on the edge of the thick mattress so he could look at Ty. Money wasn"t something they"d ever talked about, and considering how Ty was reacting to their pricey surroundings, Zane wasn"t sure if now was a good time to broach the subject, even in jest.

“It"s just for show. Having expensive things doesn"t determine who you are.”

Ty shrugged. “Not unless you"re an ass,” he answered carelessly.

He looked around the luxuriously appointed cabin. “I"ve just never known anyone who lived like this. Not sure if I can pull it off.”

Zane looked around and shrugged. He"d had pricey clothes with designer labels once upon a time, and he"d lived in ritzy places before.

He preferred his ratty sweats and apartment, or better, Ty"s row house.