Irrevocable (Evan Arden 5)

“I want you to stay,” I tell her again.

“You said that.”

“There’s more to it. I mean, there’s more now.” I bite down on my lip as my throat seizes up. My eyes burn, and I nearly fall just trying to come up with the words.

Alina is suddenly at my side, taking my hand and leading me to the couch to sit down.

“Have you been up all night?”

“Pretty much. Nightmares.”

She nods.

“Tell me what else is going on,” Alina says. “Something set you off last night, and I don’t think it was just me leaving.”

“It wasn’t.”

“What then? I don’t want to pry, but this time, I think I need to know.”

“It’s Rinaldo,” I say quietly. I don’t want to admit it out loud, but she won’t stay if she doesn’t understand. “He’s worse. They’re giving him a few days at best.”

“Oh, Evan. I’m so sorry.” She lifts her arms around my neck, and I lean against her.

“I’m not ready for all of this. I don’t want to take over the business. There was supposed to be more time.”

I feel her lips press against the top of my head, and I start to break down.

“But…but if you leave, and he…he… If I can’t find you…”

“You have my number now,” she says rationally. “You’ll be able to find me.”

“It’s not the same.”

“I know, but it’s all I can offer right now.”

“Don’t leave tomorrow.” I’m begging her, turning toward her and holding her against my chest. “Just stay a while longer. We can always reevaluate later.”

“I know you’re upset now, but we did have an agreement.” She leans back and looks into my eyes as she places her hand on my cheek. “We need to step back and figure out if this is going to work. Both of us need to do that.”

“It’s working for me.”

“I have other obligations, Evan. Those aren’t all conducive to living with you.”

“What? Your other johns?” I move a few inches away from her, pushing her hand from my face.

“That’s not what I meant.”

“Well, what did you mean?”

“Loretta has been taking care of my apartment and everything while I’ve been gone,” Alina says. “I can’t ask her to do that forever. It’s not fair to her.”

“I can take care of that.” I rationalize it all in my head. “I’ll pay the bills. Whatever works.”

“I don’t think she’d want you doing that.”

“I don’t care! I need to know you’ll be here. I know we said a week, but by then, Rinaldo will be…”

She reaches for me again, and I let her.