Tainted Bastard (Tainted Knights 4)

“Like?”

No way was I telling him about my jealousy. Instead, I gave him my second reason. “Because I’m broken. Sex is terrifying to me, Sin. The things Sicko Stan did… I don’t know if I could ever find sex enjoyable because I would always be thinking about him.”

“What did Sicko Stan do to you?” he demanded.

It was the first time I had ever brought up what happened to me, the first time he’d asked after having told me about his own abuse. I wasn’t sure if I could tell him everything that happened yet, but he deserved to know a little.

“He would come into my room almost every night and rape me. I was thirteen, and he… He broke me.” Now I was defective. A shell of the person I could have been not just on stage, but off it as well.

“How long did it go on?” he asked, his tone low and soothing, tempting me to tell him everything. But just under the surface, I saw his rage beginning to boil. Yet, for whatever reason, it didn’t scare me.

“Six months,” I admitted.

“What happened to make him stop?”

“London, Genesis, and Aubree saved me. They heard me crying out for help one night when I couldn’t handle it any longer. Aubree had only arrived at the foster home the week before. She kept a knife with her everywhere she went, and when she heard me screaming, she and the others came running to my rescue. London and Genesis jumped on his back, and Aubree…” I shuddered at the memory before finishing. “She swung the knife, and it cut his penis. Deep. He nearly died.”

“Good,” he growled. “I knew there was a reason I liked her the most.”

“Me too,” I whispered, lowering my eyes to my lap.

We were both quiet for several minutes before he touched my cheek with gentle fingers. “You’re not broken, Ro. I won’t rush you. It’s been like a year and a half, babe. I think I’ve proven by now that I would never hurt you.”

I leaned into his touch. “I know you wouldn’t.”

“Give me a chance.”

A hundred different reasons why I shouldn’t flashed through my head, yet I found myself giving in with one simple world. “Okay.”

Chapter 12

Sin

One word and I was happier than I could ever remember feeling in my entire life. My fingers contracted on her hips. “Really?”

Roanna’s smile was shy and sweet, and all I wanted to do was taste those lips again. “Yeah. Okay. Sin, I really like you. I care about you. There are so many reasons why we shouldn’t be together, but I want to be more than just your friend.”

I grazed my lips over the tip of her nose. “You’re perfect, do you know that?” Unable to stop myself, I kissed her again.

My cock flexed against her ass, but that fucker was in for a painful surprise. Kissing her was all that was going to happen until I knew she was ready for more. I wasn’t going to screw this up by letting my cock dick me over.

Her nails bit into my biceps, and her sweet little whimpers of pleasure were killing me. For someone who’d never kissed anyone before now, she seemed to enjoy it a hell of a lot. I needed to remind myself she was a newbie to all of this.

Lifting my head, I rubbed my thumb over her damp bottom lip. It was swollen and red. I wanted to kiss it until it was bruised and pulsing, but the thought of her hurting because of something I did to her was like claws shredding my sanity.

Needing a distraction, I lifted her off my lap so I didn’t cripple my poor cock. “Are you hungry?”

“A little.”

I grabbed my phone. “I’ll order us food, and then we can rehearse this song while we wait.”

Her entire face lit up. “So you’re going to sing it with me, after all?”

I lifted a brow. “You thought I wouldn’t?”

“You seemed reluctant. I know I’m pressuring you into it.”

“Do you honestly think you could make me do anything I don’t really want to do, Ro?” As much as I wanted her, as much as I cared about her—something that continued to fuck with my head—I was still a selfish asshole. No one could make me do shit if I didn’t really want to. Not even her.