But if I say I’m not going to take part in it, Lilly will be furious.
But if I do take part in it, my dad will kill me. Not to mention my mom. I mean, we could all get suspended, or something. Or hit by a delivery truck. There are a lot of them on 75th at that time of day.
Why? Why must I be saddled with a best friend who is so clearly a sociopath?
Tuesday, December 9, 8:45 p.m.
I just got the following Instant Message from Michael:
CRACKING: Did you just get that whacked-out mass e-mail from my sister?
I replied at once.
FTLOUIE: Yes.
CRACKING: You’re not going along with her stupid walkout, are you?
FTLOUIE: Oh, right. She won’t be too mad if I don’t, or anything.
CRACKING: You don’t have to do everything she says, you know, Mia. I mean, you’ve stood up to her before. Why not now?
Um, because I have enough to worry about right now—for instance, finals; my impending trip to Genovia; and, oh, yeah, the fact that I love you—without adding a fight with my best friend to the list.
But I didn’t say that, of course.
FTLOUIE: I find that the path of least resistance is often the safest one when dealing with your sister.
CRACKING: Well, I’m not doing it. Walking out, I mean.
FTLOUIE: It’s different for you. You’re her brother. She has to remain on speaking terms with you. You live together.
CRACKING: Not for much longer. Thank God.
Oh, right. He’s going away to college soon.
Well, not too far away. But about a hundred blocks or so.
FTLOUIE: That’s right. You got accepted to Columbia. Early decision, too. I never did congratulate you. So congratulations.
CRACKING: Thanks.
FTLOUIE: You must be happy that you’ll know at least one other person there. Judith Gershner, I mean.
CRACKING: Yeah, I guess so. Listen, you’re still going to be in town for the Winter Carnival, right? I mean, you’re not leaving for Genovia before the 19th are you?
All I could think was, Why is he asking me this? I mean, he can’t be going to ask me to the dance. He must know I’m going with Kenny. I mean, if Kenny ever gets around to asking me, that is. Besides, it isn’t as if Michael is available. Isn’t he going with Judith? Well? ISN’T HE?
FTLOUIE: I’m leaving for Genovia on the 20th.
CRACKING: Oh, good. Because you should really stop by the Computer Club’s booth at the Carnival, and check out this program I’ve been working on. I think you’ll like it.
I should have known. Michael isn’t going to ask me to any dance. Not in this lifetime, anyway. I should have known it was just his stupid computer program he wanted me to see. Who even cares? I suppose dumb army guys will pop out at me, and I’ll have to shoot them, or whatever. Judith’s idea, I’m sure.
I wanted to write to him, Don’t you have the slightest idea what I’m going through? That the only person with whom I can see myself committing to for all eternity is YOU? Don’t you KNOW that by now????
But instead I wrote:
FTLOUIE: Can’t wait. Well, I have to go. Bye.