Princess in Pink (The Princess Diaries 5)

ALBERT EINSTEIN HIGH:

Your help and support is vitally needed by the Students Against the Wrongful Dismissal of Jangbu Panasa Association (SATWDOJPA)! Join us tomorrow (Saturday, May 3) at noon for a rally in Central Park, and then a protest march down Fifth Avenue to the doors of Les Hautes Manger on 57th Street. Show your disapproval over the way New York City restaurateurs treat their employees! Do not listen to thepeople who argue that ours is the Materialistic Generation! Make your voice heard!

Lilly Moscovitz, President

SATWDOJPA

Hello. I didn’t know my generation was the Materialistic Generation. How can that even be? I hardly own anything. Except a cell phone. And I’ve only had that for, like, a day.

There was another message from Lilly. It went:

WOMYNRULE: Mia, missed you today at the rally. You should have been there, it was totally AMAZING! Busboys from as far away as Chinatown joined our peaceful protest. There was such a feeling of camaraderie and warmth! Best of all, you’ll never guess who showed up—Jangbu Panasa himself! He came to Les Hautes Manger to pick up his last paycheck. Was he ever surprised to see us all there, picketing on his behalf! He was really shy at first and didn’t want to talk to me. But I informed him that, though I might have been brought up in an upper-class household, and my parents are members of the intelligentsia, at heart I am as working class as he is, and have only the best interests of the common man at heart. Jangbu is coming to the march tomorrow! You should come, too, it’s going to be awesome!!!!!!!!

—Lilly

P.S. You didn’t tell me Jangbu was only eighteen years old. Did you know that he is a Sherpa? Seriously. From Nepal. Back in his home country, he already graduated from high school. He came here searching for a better life because agricultural trade in his homeland has been brought to a standstill by the politics of the Chinese occupying power in Tibet, and the only non-agricultural job young Sherpas can get is serving as porters and guides up Mount Everest. But Jangbu doesn’t like heights.

P.P.S.You also didn’t tell me he was so HOT!!!! He looks like a cross between Jackie Chan and Enrique Iglesias.

It really is quite exhausting to have geniuses as both your best friend and your boyfriend. I swear I can hardly keep up with the two of them. Their mental gymnastics are totally beyond me.

Fortunately there was also an e-mail from Tina, whose intellectual capacity is more equal to my own:

ILUVROMANCE: Mia, I’ve been thinking it over, and I’ve decided that the best time for you to ask Michael whether or not he is going to ask you to the prom really will be tomorrow night at your party. What I think we should do is organize a game of Seven Minutes in Heaven (your mom won’t care, right? I mean, she and Mr. G aren’t going to actually BE THERE during the party, are they?), and when you are in the closet with Michael, and things get hot and heavy with him, you should pop the question. Believe me, no boy can say no to anything during Seven Minutes in Heaven. Or so I’ve read.

—T

Jeez! What is with my friends? It is like they live in a completely different universe than I do. Seven Minutes in Heaven? Has Tina lost her mind? I want to have a NICE party, with Coke and Cheetos and maybe the Time Warp if I can get Mr. G to help me move the futon couch. I do NOT want a party where people are going off in the closet to make out. I mean, if I want to make out with my boyfriend, I will do it in the privacy of my own room… except of course that I’m not allowed to have Michael over when no one else is home, and when he is over, I have to leave the bedroom door open at least four inches at all times (thanks, Mr. G. You know, it totally sucks having a stepfather who is also a high-school teacher, because who is better equipped to rain on a teenager’s parade than a high-school teacher?).

I swear, between my grandmother and my friends, I don’t know who causes me the most headaches.

At least Michael left a nice message:

LINUXRULZ: You seemed pretty quiet during G and T today. Are you okay?

Thank God my boyfriend can be counted on to always be supportive of me. Except, of course, when he neglects to ask me to the prom.

I decided to ignore Lilly’s and Tina’s e-mails, but I wrote back to Michael. I tried to implement some of that subtlety Grandmère was talking about the other day. Not that I approve of Grandmère right now or anything. Still, it must be stated that she has had a lot more boyfriends than I have.

FTLOUIE: Hey! I’m fine.Thanks for asking. I just can’t shake this feeling lately that there’s something I’ve forgotten. I can’t quite put my finger on what it is, though. Something to do with this time of year, though, I think….

There! Perfect! Subtle, yet pointed. And Michael, being a genius, was sure to get it. Or so I thought, until he wrote back… which he did right away, since I guess he was online as well.

LINUXRULZ: Well, judging by the C you got on that quiz today, I’d say what you’re forgetting is everything we’ve been going over these past few weeks in Algebra. If you want, I’ll come

over on Sunday and help you with Monday’s assignment.

—M

Oh, my God. Did any girl ever have a boyfriend so totally clueless? Except possibly Lilly? Except that I think even Boris Pelkowski would have seen through my artless ploy above.

I am so depressed. I think I am going to go to bed. There is a Farscape marathon on, but I am not in the mood to watch other people’s space adventures. My own are upsetting enough.

Saturday, May 3, Day of the Big Party

My mom poked her head in bright and early and asked me if I wanted to go with her and Mr. G to BJ’s for party supplies. I guess she won the fight. Normally I love BJ’s, on account of the cavernous warehouse filled with oversize stuff, and the free cheese samples and the popcorn and everything. Not to mention the drive-through liquor store Mr. G likes to hit on the way home, where they open your trunk and fill it with six-packs of Coke without your ever even having to get out of the car.

But today, for some reason, I was too depressed even for the drive-through liquor store. So I just stayed under the covers and asked my mom weakly if she minded going without me. I said I had a sore throat and thought I should stay in bed until it was time for the party, just to make sure I was well enough actually to attend it.