Ender's Shadow (The Shadow 1)
I must be losing it, thought Bean. What does it matter that Bonzo was Spanish and Pablo de Noches was Spanish? What does it matter that anybody is anything?
And while these thoughts ran through Bean's mind, he babbled, trying to talk like someone who didn't know anything, trying to reassu
re Ender but knowing that if Ender believed that he knew nothing, then his words were meaningless, and if Ender realized that Bean was only faking ignorance, then his words were all lies. "Was it true he had a whole bunch of guys gang up on you?" Bean wanted to run from the room, he sounded so lame, even to himself.
"No," said Ender. "It was just him and me. He fought with honor."
Bean was relieved. Ender was turned so deeply inward right now that he didn't even register what Bean was saying, how false it was.
"I didn't fight with honor," said Ender. "I fought to win."
Yes, that's right, thought Bean. Fought the only way that's worth fighting, the only way that has any point. "And you did. Kicked him right out of orbit." It was as close as Bean could come to telling him the truth.
There was a knock on the door. Then it opened, immediately, without waiting for an answer. Before Bean could turn to see who it was, he knew it was a teacher--Ender looked up too high for it to be a kid.
Major Anderson and Colonel Graff.
"Ender Wiggin," said Graff.
Ender rose to his feet. "Yes sir." The deadness had returned to his voice.
"Your display of temper in the battleroom today was insubordinate and is not to be repeated."
Bean couldn't believe the stupidity of it. After what Ender had been through--what the teachers had put him through--and they have to keep playing this oppressive game with him? Making him feel utterly alone even now? These guys were relentless.
Ender's only answer was another lifeless "Yes sir." But Bean was fed up. "I think it was about time somebody told a teacher how we felt about what you've been doing."
Anderson and Graff didn't show a sign they'd even heard him. Instead, Anderson handed Ender a full sheet of paper. Not a transfer slip. A full-fledged set of orders. Ender was being transferred out of the school.
"Graduated?" Bean asked.
Ender nodded.
"What took them so long?" asked Bean. "You're only two or three years early. You've already learned how to walk and talk and dress yourself. What will they have left to teach you?" The whole thing was such a joke. Did they really think anybody was fooled? You reprimand Ender for insubordination, but then you graduate him because you've got a war coming and you don't have a lot of time to get him ready. He's your hope of victory, and you treat him like something you scrape off your shoe.
"All I know is, the game's over," said Ender. He folded the paper. "None too soon. Can I tell my army?"
"There isn't time," said Graff. "Your shuttle leaves in twenty minutes. Besides, it's better not to talk to them after you get your orders. It makes it easier."
"For them or for you?" Ender asked.
He turned to Bean, took his hand. To Bean, it was like the touch of the finger of God. It sent light all through him. Maybe I am his friend. Maybe he feels toward me some small part of the . . . feeling I have for him.
And then it was over. Ender let go of his hand. He turned toward the door.
"Wait," said Bean. "Where are you going? Tactical? Navigational? Support?"
"Command School," said Ender.
"Pre-command?"
"Command." Ender was out the door.
Straight to Command School. The elite school whose location was even a secret. Adults went to Command School. The battle must be coming very soon, to skip right past all the things they were supposed to learn in Tactical and Pre-Command.
He caught Graff by the sleeve. "Nobody goes to Command School until they're sixteen!" he said.
Graff shook off Bean's hand and left. If he caught Bean's sarcasm, he gave no sign of it.