Fallout (Crank 3)

sprint almost sent me to

the hospital because my

asthma (which can no doubt

be attributed to your

tweaking during the first

trimester you were pregnant

with me, and smoking the entire

nine months) kicked in so

hard I could barely suck

enough air to keep my

face from turning blue.”

Extracurricular stuff?

“Sure, because I’ve been

encouraged so regularly

to explore my unique set

of talents, huh? And, like,

I’ve got parents who’d

come watch me perform

even if I could sing or act

or dance or whatever.

No, Mother. My only

extracurricular stuff has

to do with making out.”

I COULDN’T SAY THAT, THOUGH

Because then she’d feel validated

about her other regular line of inquiry:

Boyfriends? No?

Girlfriends, then?

Either way, it’s all

good with me.