Fallout (Crank 3)

I mean to my mother? Why

can’t I open my mouth and ask?

Summer

BEEN THINKING

So much about where I might

be going, I’ve kind of neglected

thinking about where I came from.

Wonder how Christmas was for Ashante.

Did Santa visit? Does she still believe,

despite having her innocence stolen?

What about Simone? Did Bear and Blonde

deliver? How about Eliana and Rosa,

sisters who I never really got to know.

Sisters missing their mother. At least

they have each other. And now that I have

a sister, will we have each other too?

We will not, I predict, ever have a mom,

not the kind who we’ll sit down at dinner

with. Except for on holidays, that is.

I wish Kyle were here to share this

holiday dinner. Wonder what hospital

turkey is like. Wonder if he is lonely.

NOT MUCH ROOM

For loneliness here.

The table is heaped

with food, surrounded

by four generations

of family. It’s sensory

detail, maxed. Perfume

of Christmas feast.