Friend-Zoned (Friend-Zoned 1)

Nat, Meems, and Lola shake their heads at me. Nat says, “She met him at Winnie’s the other day. All I know is his name is Chad and he’s an Accountant. ”

Chad. The name of an axe murderer.

Definitely.

Mimi looks around and offers, “Well, what did you expect? Tina’s a fox, Nik. She’s a great catch for any guy. The perfect catch. ”

Lola nods her agreement and softly finishes, “And you guys are just friends, right?”

Rather than answer them, I walk down the hall into my room and shut the door.

Once I’m in I walk over to my bed and lay back on it.

Calm down. Everything will work itself out.

I hope.

***

After expertly avoiding answering Chad’s extremely invasive questions, I excuse myself to use the ladies room. Once inside, I take my cell phone out of my purse and text Nat.

Me: This guy is a fruitcake! Emergency bail procedure in T-Minus ten minutes.

Nat: Gotcha. Turn you cell phone volume up.

I walk back to the table with a bright smile and sit. I answer some of Chad’s less invasive questions then my cell phone blasts ‘Thrift Shop’ by Macklemore.

Show time.

I take my cell phone out of the bag look at the display fake frowning. I say in an almost genuinely confused voice, “Oh. Please excuse me. This could be important. ”

I furrow my brow and answer the phone, “Hello?”

Nat sounds amused when she says, “Blah blah blah. Dog hit by car. ”

I widen my eyes and put a hand to my chest. I whisper loudly, “What? No! Not Fluffy!”

Nat answers in all seriousness, “I think we should get a dog. Or two. ”

I lower my head, put the hand on my chest up to my forehead and wail, “Oh No! Not my precious baby!”

Nat sounds as though she’s made a decision, “We’ll get two. ” More excitedly. “Pugs! We’ll call ‘em Pizza and Donut!”

I wipe tears I haven’t shed off my cheeks. I respond in a shaky voice, “Why? Dear God, why?”

Nat replies as though I answered her previous statement, “Because I get lonely sometimes, ya know!”

I slump my shoulders and force them to shake. I whisper softly, “Don’t make any decisions without me, doctor. I’m on my way. ”

Nat giggles and dramatically says, “And the award for best acting under pressure goes to Teeny!” Then her voice turns serious. “But seriously, I want a dog. ”

Dial tone.

She hung up on me!

Chapter Seventeen

I gots a boo-boo