The Savior (Black Dagger Brotherhood 17)

“Relax, Murhder,” Wrath said dryly as he bent down and picked up the one hundred pounds of blond fur. “You’re freaking out my dog.”

“Me? You’re sure it’s not that private guard of yours?”

Wrath turned in a deliberate way, as if he were orientating himself by memory rather than sight, and then he walked toward the fireplace. As he went, he stroked the dog, who put his front paws on each of the King’s shoulders and nestled his muzzle deep into all that long black hair. The way those kind brown eyes squeezed shut suggested the animal was trying to find his happy place.

Wonder if there’s room for two there, Murhder thought.

The King settled his weight into one of two armchairs, and positioned the dog on his lap. “George doesn’t like me to raise my voice.”

“Then he must be anxious as hell most of the time.”

Wrath let his head rest on the high back of the chair. His hand, the one with the King’s ring, went up and down on the retriever’s flank.

“Tell me why you think any problem of yours is a problem of mine,” he said.

“I need your help.”

“Doesn’t answer my question.”

“It’s the truth.”

“Twenty years, and you show up here with a demand. So like you. I take it you’re back to your old self again.”

“I just have to find this female—”

“Do you have any idea the kind of problems you caused? On the way to your whatever the hell it was—your breakdown?”

Murhder closed his eyes and muttered to himself.

“What was that?” Wrath cut in sharply. “Are you suggesting I’m not allowed to have an opinion, after we cleaned up your fucking mess?”

“I didn’t ask you to do anything for me.”

“Bullshit. You disappeared on us for two months, and then showed up from out of nowhere obsessed with shit that had nothing to do with the war against the Lessening Society.” Wrath leaned to the side and picked a folder up off the floor. “You burned one biomedical firm down. And then went to another and did this.”

With a toss, the King sent the folder and its contents flying, the color photographs inside fanning out in a slide show that ended at Murhder’s feet.

Bodies. Staked to the ground. Their internal organs removed.

He didn’t need to be reminded of the images. He’d seen the massacre up close and personal—which was what happened when you were the one responsible for the carnage.

What he was not responsible for was that fire in the first facility. That had been Xhex going back and taking care of business for herself—and he would never forget the sight of her standing against the backdrop of the flames, vengeance in the flesh. But he had protected her secrets back then and he was still going to protect her now.

If the Brotherhood had it wrong and blamed him? What the hell did he care?

“You’re right, you didn’t technically ask us to clean up the mess,” Wrath said. “But what you did to those humans made Hannibal Lecter look like an amateur. You made things really goddamn complicated on your way to the exit.”

Murhder’s knees popped as he squatted down and gathered up the glossies. “It was less than they deserved—”

“You field dressed seven scientists on the grounds of one of the country’s foremost medical research companies.”

Murhder shoved the eight-by-tens back into the folder. “They were experimenting on our kind, Wrath. On a male and on a pregnant female. What did you expect me to do, leave them a strongly worded letter?”

There was a period of silence. “That wasn’t the way to handle it.”

“I tried to get both of those vampires out.” Murhder cleared his throat as his voice cracked. “But I had to … leave the pregnant female behind because everything went wrong.”

A barrage of images blinded him … all things he couldn’t bear thinking about: After that emaciated male got shot, Murhder himself was drilled in the side by a bullet. More humans came. Complete chaos with all the gunfire. Then the male died in his arms.

Murhder had been left with no choice but to dematerialize out of there before he himself lost too much blood.

By the time he’d returned the next night, after having fed from a Chosen and gotten his strength back, the pregnant female had been moved.

That was when he’d lost it and gone on the hunt for those scientists. The first white-coated lab worker he’d come to? He’d searched the man’s memories and discovered he had been in on the top secret project—and Murhder had intended to delve further to find out where the female had been taken. His hands, however, had taken over, his brute strength fueled by vengeance and unchecked after what the symphaths had done to him. He’d choked the human unconscious and dragged him to the next human he’d found. And the next. And a fourth.

All of them had worked in the lab where the vampires had been held.

Seven of them.

Murhder had lived up to his name that night. Had stacked the men like logs and then carried them out via a receiving dock. Which was where he’d found the iron stakes. And the mallet.

He’d used his black dagger only after he’d immobilized them.

The men had regained consciousness screaming. And as other humans had come running, he took control of their minds and frozen them where they stood. By the time dawn had come, he had an audience of a hundred stupor’d sentries, all staring in zombie-like trances at the work he did. Wrath called it field dressing. But that was just the end result.

He had experimented on those seven. Taken his time and staggered his attention, working on one for a while, before leaving him alive and moving to the next. And the next and the next. Until the final … after which he’d returned to the first. His victims had heard the suffering and begging of their ilk—all the while knowing their turn was coming again soon.

It was what Xhex and that male and that pregnant female had been through.

Payback. Yet it had cost him. Unhinged as he was, he had not gotten the information he needed, did not know where the female had been taken, had no other way of finding her location. And he had realized this only as he had returned to Caldwell.

Coming back to the present, he cleared his throat. “I’ve had to live for the last twenty years with the knowledge that I left one of ours behind. Who was pregnant. Do you have any idea what that’s been like? I had to see her through the bars of a fucking cage, screaming for me to help her, to not leave her, to not let them continue to torture her—and she was in labor. Do you have any concept of what that has done to me …” He rubbed his stinging eyes. “I know you think I’m insane for what I did to those doctors. I know that was why I got kicked out of the Brotherhood. You couldn’t trust me anymore. I get that. But it was the right thing to do and I will not apologize for my vengeance.”

“Of course not,” Wrath muttered. “Why would you.”

Murhder shook his head. “Balance is what the Scribe Virgin demands, right? It’s a universal law. And I made sure I took the suffering of our kind out of the hides of those who had been responsible. You used to be an eye-for-an-eye kind of male. I saw what you did to slayers. You think the way you treated our enemy was just because you wanted to save our race? Bullshit. You watched your parents get slaughtered in front of you by lessers. So you know exactly what I was doing when I took my damn time with those humans.” o;Relax, Murhder,” Wrath said dryly as he bent down and picked up the one hundred pounds of blond fur. “You’re freaking out my dog.”

“Me? You’re sure it’s not that private guard of yours?”

Wrath turned in a deliberate way, as if he were orientating himself by memory rather than sight, and then he walked toward the fireplace. As he went, he stroked the dog, who put his front paws on each of the King’s shoulders and nestled his muzzle deep into all that long black hair. The way those kind brown eyes squeezed shut suggested the animal was trying to find his happy place.

Wonder if there’s room for two there, Murhder thought.

The King settled his weight into one of two armchairs, and positioned the dog on his lap. “George doesn’t like me to raise my voice.”

“Then he must be anxious as hell most of the time.”

Wrath let his head rest on the high back of the chair. His hand, the one with the King’s ring, went up and down on the retriever’s flank.

“Tell me why you think any problem of yours is a problem of mine,” he said.

“I need your help.”

“Doesn’t answer my question.”

“It’s the truth.”

“Twenty years, and you show up here with a demand. So like you. I take it you’re back to your old self again.”

“I just have to find this female—”

“Do you have any idea the kind of problems you caused? On the way to your whatever the hell it was—your breakdown?”

Murhder closed his eyes and muttered to himself.

“What was that?” Wrath cut in sharply. “Are you suggesting I’m not allowed to have an opinion, after we cleaned up your fucking mess?”

“I didn’t ask you to do anything for me.”

“Bullshit. You disappeared on us for two months, and then showed up from out of nowhere obsessed with shit that had nothing to do with the war against the Lessening Society.” Wrath leaned to the side and picked a folder up off the floor. “You burned one biomedical firm down. And then went to another and did this.”

With a toss, the King sent the folder and its contents flying, the color photographs inside fanning out in a slide show that ended at Murhder’s feet.

Bodies. Staked to the ground. Their internal organs removed.

He didn’t need to be reminded of the images. He’d seen the massacre up close and personal—which was what happened when you were the one responsible for the carnage.

What he was not responsible for was that fire in the first facility. That had been Xhex going back and taking care of business for herself—and he would never forget the sight of her standing against the backdrop of the flames, vengeance in the flesh. But he had protected her secrets back then and he was still going to protect her now.

If the Brotherhood had it wrong and blamed him? What the hell did he care?

“You’re right, you didn’t technically ask us to clean up the mess,” Wrath said. “But what you did to those humans made Hannibal Lecter look like an amateur. You made things really goddamn complicated on your way to the exit.”

Murhder’s knees popped as he squatted down and gathered up the glossies. “It was less than they deserved—”

“You field dressed seven scientists on the grounds of one of the country’s foremost medical research companies.”

Murhder shoved the eight-by-tens back into the folder. “They were experimenting on our kind, Wrath. On a male and on a pregnant female. What did you expect me to do, leave them a strongly worded letter?”

There was a period of silence. “That wasn’t the way to handle it.”

“I tried to get both of those vampires out.” Murhder cleared his throat as his voice cracked. “But I had to … leave the pregnant female behind because everything went wrong.”

A barrage of images blinded him … all things he couldn’t bear thinking about: After that emaciated male got shot, Murhder himself was drilled in the side by a bullet. More humans came. Complete chaos with all the gunfire. Then the male died in his arms.

Murhder had been left with no choice but to dematerialize out of there before he himself lost too much blood.

By the time he’d returned the next night, after having fed from a Chosen and gotten his strength back, the pregnant female had been moved.

That was when he’d lost it and gone on the hunt for those scientists. The first white-coated lab worker he’d come to? He’d searched the man’s memories and discovered he had been in on the top secret project—and Murhder had intended to delve further to find out where the female had been taken. His hands, however, had taken over, his brute strength fueled by vengeance and unchecked after what the symphaths had done to him. He’d choked the human unconscious and dragged him to the next human he’d found. And the next. And a fourth.

All of them had worked in the lab where the vampires had been held.

Seven of them.

Murhder had lived up to his name that night. Had stacked the men like logs and then carried them out via a receiving dock. Which was where he’d found the iron stakes. And the mallet.

He’d used his black dagger only after he’d immobilized them.

The men had regained consciousness screaming. And as other humans had come running, he took control of their minds and frozen them where they stood. By the time dawn had come, he had an audience of a hundred stupor’d sentries, all staring in zombie-like trances at the work he did. Wrath called it field dressing. But that was just the end result.

He had experimented on those seven. Taken his time and staggered his attention, working on one for a while, before leaving him alive and moving to the next. And the next and the next. Until the final … after which he’d returned to the first. His victims had heard the suffering and begging of their ilk—all the while knowing their turn was coming again soon.

It was what Xhex and that male and that pregnant female had been through.

Payback. Yet it had cost him. Unhinged as he was, he had not gotten the information he needed, did not know where the female had been taken, had no other way of finding her location. And he had realized this only as he had returned to Caldwell.

Coming back to the present, he cleared his throat. “I’ve had to live for the last twenty years with the knowledge that I left one of ours behind. Who was pregnant. Do you have any idea what that’s been like? I had to see her through the bars of a fucking cage, screaming for me to help her, to not leave her, to not let them continue to torture her—and she was in labor. Do you have any concept of what that has done to me …” He rubbed his stinging eyes. “I know you think I’m insane for what I did to those doctors. I know that was why I got kicked out of the Brotherhood. You couldn’t trust me anymore. I get that. But it was the right thing to do and I will not apologize for my vengeance.”

“Of course not,” Wrath muttered. “Why would you.”

Murhder shook his head. “Balance is what the Scribe Virgin demands, right? It’s a universal law. And I made sure I took the suffering of our kind out of the hides of those who had been responsible. You used to be an eye-for-an-eye kind of male. I saw what you did to slayers. You think the way you treated our enemy was just because you wanted to save our race? Bullshit. You watched your parents get slaughtered in front of you by lessers. So you know exactly what I was doing when I took my damn time with those humans.”