Things We Never Said (Hart's Boardwalk 3)

“You going to Davina’s tomorrow?”

“Yeah.” I was still a little nervous about that. Despite the good night I’d had with her and Darragh at Dad’s last Sunday, Darragh was definitely the more forgiving between my two eldest siblings.

“So … uh … Dad called me last night after what happened with Mike. He feels terrible.”

I winced. “I told him not to. I know what he was trying to do. It unfortunately backfired.”

“I take it Dad told you the reason Mike’s still in our lives is because of Dermot?”

The thought of Dermot made my stomach roil. “Yeah.” Dermot was a cop too. He and Michael worked from the same precinct. They’d become friendly when Michael and I were together, but they’d formed a little bromance after I left.

“I imagine the way Dermot feels about you has probably affected Mike’s feelings too.”

I shook my head. “No, Michael’s feelings are all his own.”

“Well, my point was going to be that Dermot has probably affected Mike, and Mom has definitely affected Dermot. And that point leads me to my next … Are you thinking about seeing Mom while you’re here?”

I looked back over my shoulder to make sure Dad was well and truly out of earshot. Then I leaned toward my brother and said in a low voice, “Dad won’t talk about the divorce. I need to know he’s okay and if he won’t give me answers, maybe Mom will.”

“Dahlia, the divorce is between those two.”

“Is it, though?”

Anger darkened his countenance. “For fuck’s sake, please do not tell me you’re going to blame yourself for this too? Jesus Christ, Dahlia, do not let Mom’s crap do this to you any longer. You let her, and you’re a martyr.”

I glowered. “Say it how you feel it, Dar.”

“I know you’re worried about Dad, but don’t be. I think this is the best thing for him.”

Shocked, I stared at him for a second. “How can you say that knowing how much they love each other?”

“Just because they love each other doesn’t mean they’re right for each other.” Darragh studied me thoughtfully. “How … How can you want her to be happy after what she said to you?”

The memory burned but I shrugged it off. “She wasn’t in her right mind.”

“Yeah? Well, she hasn’t been in her right mind for years. She pushed us all out after Dillon.” He stared at the floor, and it was the first time I’d heard the hurt in my brother’s voice. “She doesn’t have time for Davina; she spends time with the boys but she holds herself back from them. The only person she’s close to is Dermot, and she’s filled his head with all her lies.”

My first thought was for Dad. “All of this was going on, Dad was dealing with it, and he didn’t say a word to me.”

“Yeah. I’m sure it has a lot to do with the divorce. So stop blaming yourself and stop worrying. Dad will be fine.” His gaze moved across the room out into the sitting room where Dad was laughing with Leo. “He’ll be more than fine. Look at him. He looks great. He’ll start dating soon, and it’ll be a whole new chapter in his life.”

Dating? I’d never even thought of that. “You would be okay with that?”

“Of course. Krista already wants to set him up with a colleague of her mom’s.”

The idea of my Dad with anyone but my mom was very strange. Then again, the only memories I had of my parents together were from before Dillon died. Darragh had been there the nine years I’d missed out on, clearly witnessing a deterioration I hadn’t been around for.

I wondered how bad it could be that Darragh was so eager for Dad to move on.

“I still think I should face Mom. See what she has to say about all of it.” The thought made me sick. Coming back to Boston, facing everyone, had been difficult, but I’d done it. And I was still breathing.

It occurred to me that maybe clearing the air with my mother might put to rest some very persistent demons from the past.

“I’m not going to stop you,” Darragh said, sighing, “but I am noting my concern.”

“Noted.” I grinned at him. “God, it’s good to have you back, big bro.”

He slid his arm around my shoulders and walked me back out into the living room.