Defy the Dawn (Midnight Breed 14)
She recalled the few details he had given her about the woman. “You told me you met her while she was on holiday in Greece.”
He nodded. “Mykonos.”
“You also told me she was married. Unhappily, you said.”
“Yes, she was.”
Brynne tried to guess at the cause of his guilt. “Did she go back to her husband?”
“She did.”
His wooden tone conveyed more depth of emotion than if he’d shouted the words. He had loved this woman, and he had lost her. “I’m sorry.”
He expelled a sharp breath. “Don’t feel sorry for me. I don’t deserve it. I’m the one who pushed her back to him. Because of my cowardice.”
Brynne touched his rigid jaw. Although it hurt to see that he’d once loved this woman a great deal, it pained her even more to see the torment in his eyes.
She had given him numerous opportunities to explain what had happened, especially on those times when she’d suggested he was an irresponsible libertine with a possible slew of fatherless daughters around the world.
And yet, he’d preferred that she believe that, rather than share the truth about the woman who’d borne his child.
Brynne drew him down onto the sand with her. They sat together for a long moment, just looking at the waves in silence.
“What was her name?” She prompted him gently, giving him somewhere to start again.
“Sharon.” He stared out at the water. “She was a sweet girl, the most open-hearted woman I’d ever met. Once we ran into each other on that beach in Mykonos, I pursued her relentlessly. Finally, she gave in. It wasn’t until we slept together—when I had the chance to lay my hands on her mortal skin—that I realized she was very ill.”
Brynne glanced at him, confused. “What was wrong with her?”
“Cancer. It was everywhere, small enough to escape detection for many years, yet already terminal. There was no mistaking it.”
“You could feel all of that with your hands?”
He nodded soberly.
“And you didn’t tell her?” Brynne’s heart climbed into her throat. “Oh, Zael…”
“I didn’t tell her because there was nothing that could be done. The cancer would kill her, even if it was treated. There wasn’t going to be a miracle.”
“But you kept the truth from her.”
“Yes. Because I didn’t want to see her spirit crushed. I didn’t want to be the one to crush it.” He tipped his head back, silent for a long moment. When he looked at Brynne now, she saw the full depth of his self-hatred. “I didn’t want to be with her, knowing I was holding that secret. So I left. I didn’t tell her I was going. I didn’t tell her anything. I just…left.”
Brynne didn’t say anything. She knew he didn’t want sympathy, but she felt it for him anyway. It had been many years since he met Dylan’s mother, but he still carried the pain. And the guilt.
“You want to know the ironic thing?”
She gave him a wobbly nod, still trying to process everything she’d heard so far.
“In the end, it wasn’t the cancer that killed Sharon. Dylan told me that just a few days ago.” He turned a stark look on Brynne. “It was Dragos who killed her.”
“How?”
“Sharon was dying from the disease, but during that same time Dylan and her warrior mate, Rio, were just getting to know each other. It’s a long story, but Sharon became entangled in some of Dragos’s schemes and when he attempted to use her to get close enough to hurt Dylan, Sharon sacrificed herself to save her daughter. My daughter.”
“Oh, my God.” Brynne blew out a heavy sigh, her heart breaking for Zael and for Dylan. And for the special woman who had meant a great deal to both of them. “I’m so sorry.”
“Now you know,” he said, his deep voice solemn, yet still burdened. “I’m not a good man, Brynne. I’ve taken my pleasure wherever I’ve wanted, with little thought for the consequences. What I’ve never taken well is responsibility. I’ve never been steady or reliable. I’ve never been committed to anything but myself. You need to know that. You needed to know it a lot sooner than now.”