Moving Pictures (Discworld 10)

'-and she was lying there all longgrass,' said Rock. 'An' you swept her up, and she said-'

'Long grass?' said Ginger weakly.

'Languorous,' said Victor. 'I think he means languorous.'

'-she said, “Why, it is the Thief of : . . the Thief of . . . ” ' Rock hesitated. 'Dad's Bag, I think you said.'

'Bagged Dad,' said Morry, rubbing his arm.

'Yeah, an' then she said, “You are in great danger, for my father has sworn to kill you”, and Victor said “But now, o fairest rose, I can reveal that I am really the Shadow of the Dessert-” '

'What's languorous mean?' said Ginger suspiciously.

'An' he said, “Fly with me now to the casbah”, or something like that, an' then he gave her this, this, thing humans do with their lips-'

'Whistle?' said Victor, with hopeless hope.

'Nah, the other thing. Sounds like a cork coming out of a bottle,' said Rock.

'Kiss,' said Ginger, coldly.

'Yeah. Not that I'm any judge,' said Rock, 'but it seemed to go on for a while. Definitely very, you know, kissy.'

'I thought it was going to be bucket-of-water time myself,' said a quiet canine voice behind Victor. He kicked out backwards, but failed to connect.

'And then he was back on the camel and dragged her up and Mr Dibbler shouted “Stop, stop, what the hell's going on, why won't anyone tell me what the hell's going on,” ' said Rock. 'And then you said “What happened?” '

'Don't know when I last saw swordplay like that,' said Morry.

'Oh,' said Victor. 'Well. Thank you.'

'All that shouting “Ha!” and “Have at you, you dog”. Very professional,' said Morry.

'I see,' said Victor. He reached sideways and grabbed Ginger's arm.

'We've got to talk,' he hissed. 'Somewhere quiet. Behind the tent.'

'If you think I'm going anywhere alone with you-'she began.

'Listen, this is no time to start acting like-'

A heavy hand settled on Victor's shoulder. He turned, and saw the shape of Detritus eclipsing the world.

'Mr Dibbler doesn't want anyone running off,' he said. 'Everyone has to stay until Mr Dibbler says.'

'You're a real pain, you know,' said Victor. Detritus gave him a big, gem-studded grin. [13]

'Mr Dibbler says I can be a vice-president,' he said proudly.

'In charge of what?' said Victor.

'Vice-presidents,' said Detritus.

Gaspode the Wonder Dog made a little growling sound at the back of his throat. The camel, which had been idly staring at the sky, sidled around a bit and suddenly lashed out with a kick that caught the troll in the small of the back. Detritus yelped. Gaspode gave the world a look of satisfied innocence.

'Come on,' said Victor grimly. 'While he's trying to find something to hit the camel with.'

They sat down in the shade behind the tent.