Witches Abroad (Discworld 12)

'I lied about my height, Mrs Ogg. I'm a world-famous liar.'

'Is that true?'

'No.'

'What about you being the world's greatest lover?'

There was silence for a while.

'Well, maybe I'm only No. 2,' said Casanunda. 'But I try harder.'

'Can't you go and find us a file or something, Mr Casanunda?' said Magrat.

'I'll see what I can do, Miss.'

The face disappeared.

'Maybe we could get people to visit us and then we could escape in their clothes?' said Nanny Ogg.

'Now I've gone and stuck the pin in my finger,' muttered Granny Weatherwax.

'Or maybe we could get Magrat to seduce one of the guards,' said Nanny.

'Why don't you? said Magrat, as nastily as she could manage.

'All right. I'm game.'

'Shut up, the pair of you,' said Granny. 'I'm trying to think - '

There was another sound at the window.

It was Legba.

The black cockerel peered in between the bars for a moment, and then fluttered away.

'Gives me the creeps, that one,' said Nanny. 'Can't look at him without thinking wistfully of sage-and-onion and mashed potatoes.'

Her crinkled face crinkled further.

'Greebo!' she said. 'Where'd we leave him?'

'Oh, he's only a cat,' said Granny Weatherwax. 'Cats know how to look after themselves.'

'He's really just a big softie - ' Nanny began, before someone started pulling down the wall.

A hole appeared. A grey hand appeared and grasped another stone. There was a strong smell of river mud.

Rock crumbled under heavy fingers.

'Ladies?' said a resonant voice.

'Well, Mister Saturday,' said Nanny, 'as I live and breathe - saving your presence, o'course.'

Saturday grunted something and walked away.

There was a hammering on the door and someone started fumbling with keys.

'We don't want to hang around here,' said Granny. 'Come on.'