Witches Abroad (Discworld 12)

Then she stood back, hit the rock sharply with her broomstick, and spake thusly:

'Open up, you little sods!'

Nanny Ogg kicked the rock. It made a hollow boom.

'There's people catching their death of cold out here!' she added.

Nothing happened for a while. Then a section of rock swung in a few inches. Magrat saw the glint of a suspicious eye.

'Yes?'

'Dwarfs?' said Magrat.

Granny Weatherwax leaned down until her nose was level with the eye.

'My name,' she said, 'is Granny Weatherwax.'

She straightened up again, her face glowing with self-satisfaction.

'Who's that, then?' said a voice from somewhere below the eye. Granny's expression froze.

Nanny Ogg nudged her partner.

'We must be more'n fifty miles away from home,' she said. 'They might not have heard of you in these parts.'

Granny leaned down again. Accumulated snowflakes cascaded off her hat.

'I ain't blaming you,' she said, 'but I know you'll have a King in there, so just you go and tell him Granny Weatherwax is here, will you?'

'He's very busy,' said the voice. 'We've just had a bit of trouble.'

'Then I'm sure he don't want any more,' said Granny.

The invisible speaker appeared to give this some consideration.

'We put writing on the door,' it said sulkily. 'In invisible runes. It's really expensive, getting proper invisible runes done.'

'I don't go around readin' doors,' said Granny.

The speaker hesitated.

'Weatherwax, did you say?'

'Yes. With a W. As in “witch”.'

The door slammed. When it was shut, there was barely a visible crack in the rock.

The snow was falling fast now. Granny Weatherwax jiggled up and down a bit to keep warm.

'That's foreigners for you,' she said, to the frozen world in general.

'I don't think you can call dwarfs foreigners,' said Nanny Ogg.

'Don't see why not,' said Granny. 'A dwarf who lives a long way off has got to be foreign. That's what foreign means.'

'Yeah? Funny to think of it like that,' said Nanny.

They watched the door, their breath forming three little clouds in the darkening air. Magrat peered at the stone door.