Thud! (Discworld 34)

"Good! You told me to drag them into the light! As far as they"re concerned, I am far-reaching consequences!"

"Well, certainly" said Vetinari, after staring at Vimes for longer than was comfortable. "And when you have boldly reached so far, you will need friends. I shall make sure the Low King is at least aware of your presence."

"Don"t worry, he"ll find out soon enough," growled Vimes. "Oh yes.

"I have no doubt he will. He has his agents in our city, just as I have in his. So I will do him the courtesy of telling him formally what he will in any case know. That is called politics, Vimes. It is a thing we try to do in the government."

"But ... spies? I thought we were chums with the Low King!" "Of course we are," said Vetinari. "And the more we know about each other, the friendlier we shall remain. We"d hardly bother to spy on our enemies. What would be the point? Is Lady Sybil happy to let you go?"

"She"s coming with me. She insists:

"Is that safe?"

"Is here safe?" said Vimes, shrugging. "We had dwarfs coming up through the damn floor! Don"t worry, she and Young Sam will be kept out of harm"s way. I"ll take Fred and Nobby. And I want to take Angua, Sally, Detritus and Cheery, too. Multi-species, sir. That always helps the politics:

"And the Summoning Dark? What about that, Vimes? Oh, don"t look at me like that. It"s common talk among the dwarfs. One of the dying dwarfs put a curse on everyone who was in the mine, I"m told."

"I wouldn"t know about that, sir," said Vimes, resorting to the wooden expression that so often saw him through. "It"s mystic. We don"t do mystic in the Watch."

"It"s not a joke, Vimes. It"s very old magic, I understand. So old, indeed, that most dwarfs have forgotten that it is magic. And it"s powerful. It will be tracking them."

"I"ll just look out for a big floaty eye with a tail, then, shall I?" said Vimes. "That should make it easy."

Vimes, I know you must be aware that the symbol is not the thing itself," said the Patrician.

"Yessir. I know. But magic has no place in coppering. We don"t use it to find culprits. We don"t use it to get confessions. Because you can"t trust the bloody stuff, sir. It"s got a mind of its own. If there"s a curse chasing these bastards, well, that"s its business. But if I reach "em first, sir, then they"ll be my prisoners and it"ll have to get past me.

"Vimes, Archchancellor Ridcully tells me he believes it may be a quasi-demonic entity that is untold millions of years old!"

"I"ve said my piece, sir," said Vimes, staring at a point just above Lord Vetinari"s head. "And it is my duty to catch up with these people. I believe they may be able to help me with my inquiries."

"But you have no evidence, Vimes. And you are going to need very solid evidence."

"Right. So I want to bring them back here, eyeballs on a string or not. Them and their damn guards. So"s I can inquire. Someone will tell me something:

"And it"ll also be to your personal satisfaction?" said Vetinari sharply.

"Is this a trick question, sir?"

"Well done, well done," said Vetinari softly. "Lady Sybil is a remarkable woman, Vimes."

"Yessir. She is."

Vimes left.

After a while Vetinari"s chief clerk, Drumknott, entered the room on velvet feet and placed a cup of tea in front of Vetinari. "Thank you, Drumknott. You were listening?" "Yes, sir. The commander seemed very forthright." "They invaded his home, Drumknott."

"Quite, sir."

Vetinari leaned back and stared at the ceiling. "Tell me, Drumknott, are you a betting man?"

"I have been known to have the occasional little "flutter"; sir." "Given, then, a contest between an invisible and very powerful quasi-demonic thing of pure vengeance on the one hand, and the

commander on the other, where would you wager, say... one dollar?" "I wouldn"t, sir. That looks like one that would go to the judges." "Yes," said Vetinari, staring thoughtfully at the closed door. "Yes,

indeed."

I don"t use magic, thought Vimes, walking through the rain towards Unseen University. But, sometimes, I tell lies.