Ruined (Ethan Frost 1)

His hands tug gently at my hair, guiding my mouth where he wants it to go. I like the sharp little tugs on my scalp, the brief twinges of pain that make the pleasure I feel at learning him this way so much sweeter. Running my tongue along the underside of his cock, I move with him as he gently tugs at my hair, his hands guiding my mouth where he wants it to go.

I lick at him, swirling my tongue around the length of him again and again and again before I stop to linger at the head of his cock.

I probe the little slit there with my tongue and I relish the sound he makes low and deep in his throat as much as I relish the salty taste that comes with the drops of pre-ejaculate he spills. He tastes good, feels good, and as his hips begin to move—as he begins to thrust himself gently into my mouth—I know that I want more. I want everything he has and I want him to give it to me, no holds barred.

But, much to my disappointment, Ethan has other ideas. He doesn’t let me play for long, doesn’t let me bring him to orgasm as he’s done for me. Instead, he pulls me up, his mouth taking mine in a greedy, rapacious kiss that has me seeing stars even as I cling to him.

His tongue sweeps across my lips and I open myself to him. I take everything he has to give me and then demand more. Demand everything. He’s held back long enough. I want all of Ethan, and I want him now.

He groans when I suck his lower lip between my teeth, then slides his hands down to cup my ass. I gasp as he pulls me closer to him and settles his heavy cock against the apex of my thighs.

I open my eyes, find him watching me with concern. Which is sweet, but right now I want the fire much more than I want the tenderness. So I hitch my leg over his hip and move so that he’s pressed right up against my sex. Then I slide my hands into his hair and tug harder than he ever tugged at mine, while I thrust my tongue deep into the recesses of his mouth.

A deep growl rumbles up from Ethan’s chest, and somehow it only stokes the flames that are burning through every part of me. “Ethan, I need—” More. I need more, but I don’t know how to say that. Don’t even know what exactly it is I’m asking for.

But Ethan does. “I’ve got you, sweetheart. I’ve got you. ” And then his mouth is on me, skimming from my neck to my breastbone to the undersides of my breasts. He sucks my nipple into his mouth, nips at it sharply before soothing the small hurt with his tongue.

Again and again he bites, then soothes, until the experience of mild pain and overwhelming pleasure blends into one glorious mixture so closely related that I can’t tell where one begins and the other ends. My nipples, my breasts, my neck, my shoulders, my back, he explores them all. Again and again and again, until my skin is flushed pink and I have more than a few small hickeys decorating my body.

I love it, the way I love my navel ring and my tattoo. The way I love the brand-new belly bracelet resting against my hips. Because with every love bite he gives me, Ethan is helping me reaffirm my control over my own body. My right to do with it as I please.

But eventually it gets to be too much. And not enough. I need more. I need everything. Ethan seems to know instinctively when I hit that point, or maybe he’s hit it, too. But suddenly there’s an urgency in his callused hands as they stroke over my body, a sense of desire that will no longer be denied.

“Ethan. ” His name is a trembling sigh on my lips, a desperate plea that I can’t hold back as I tremble and arch against him. “Fuck me, please. Fuck me now. ”

He’s trembling now, too, as he rolls over onto his back and pulls me over him.

“What—” I start to ask, but he stops me with a finger to my lips.

“Right now you’re in control, Chloe. ” Those are the last words I’d ever expect to hear from Ethan, but I know he means them. I can see the sincerity shining in his eyes, feel it in the tight restraints he’s keeping on his own needs.

And though I want to tell him that I don’t need it, that I’m happy to cede control to him, there’s a part of me that knows he’s right. That just for tonight, just for this first time, I need to be the one in control of my body.

I need to be the one who takes him.

So I nod even as I twine my fingers with his. “Help me?” I ask, suddenly uncertain despite all my reassurances to the contrary.

He lifts our joined hands to my face, strokes a tender finger down my cheek. “Always, baby. Whatever you need. ”

With those words, my desire comes rushing back. It drowns the uncertainty, drowns the fear, drowns everything but the need I have for this beautiful, beautiful man.

He slides a condom on before his hands go to my hips, lift me up slowly, and then settle me gently, ever so gently, astride him as he keeps his eyes on mine. I push down, softly at first and then harder as pleasure—unbelievable, unbearable pleasure—streaks through me. And then, with one downward thrust, he’s buried in me to the hilt.

Part of me wants to rush to completion, to make this a headlong sprint toward ecstasy. But another part of me, the one that is so in tune with Ethan, wants to take it slow. To savor every second.

In the end, he helps me decide, as he’s helped me with everything else on this unexpected journey. He clutches my hips with gentle fingers and slowly—oh so slowly—lifts me up, then lowers me down.

I gasp, take a deep breath. He feels so good. This feels so good. Exactly like I expected, but not. Somehow it’s more. Somehow doing this with Ethan is everything.

And so I ride him slowly, sweetly, cherishing him and us and this one perfect moment the only way I know how. I immerse myself in him in the way he looks at me and the way he feels inside me. Wrap myself in the feelings that grow larger, more tangible with every leisurely glide of my body on his.

He fills me up, and each movement of my body—his body—sends pleasure coursing through me. Indescribable. Unfathomable. Delicious. I rise up on my knees, then lower myself down on him. Again and again and again, biting my lip to keep from moaning. Clenching my muscles around him to keep from coming for just a little while longer. But the relaxed rhythm can’t last forever, not when Ethan and I have been working toward this moment from the moment we met. Tension begins to build in me, in him, the ache deep inside me becoming more and more unbearable. I can tell it’s the same for him, can feel it in the tautness of his body beneath mine and the clenching of his hands on my hips.

I know he’s struggling to keep from wresting control from me and it only makes me want him more. Only makes me need him more.

Soon, desire is a wild thing within me. A desperate, driving force that changes everything. For both of us.

I lean over to give him a kiss and sweat drips from me, mingles with the sweat glistening on him as well. His body entices me, all hot and wet and muscular, and I dip my head lower. Lick a path up his gorgeous, gleaming chest.