Circle of Desire (Damask Circle 3)

He sighed. “Kat, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean—”

“Yes, you did.” She stared ahead, determined not to let the hurt show. But anger crept past her guard to roughen her voice as she added, “And I guess it’s easy for you to think that because that’s exactly what I’ve been with you.”

He touched her knee. “You’ve been nothing short of wonderful and—”

“Yeah, I guess sex on tap is a wonderful thing for a werewolf in the midst of moon fever.”

She ignored his touch, ignored the way it made her feel inside. What did it matter? He would obviously never settle for someone like her, even if she could get him to admit he was capable of feeling something more than friendship.

He didn’t say anything. Nor did she expect him to, given his continuing insistence that there was nothing more than sex between them. They drove in silence until the motel came into view. He stopped near the manager’s office, and she climbed out, went inside, and got them a room and some extra towels.

“I’ll call Gran if you want to grab the first shower.” She unlocked the door to their room and tossed him the towels as she walked across to the phone.

There was a certain amount of wariness in his expression—as if he wasn’t quite sure what he should do or say. “You need to warm up more than me.”

“I also need to call my grandmother.”

She turned her back on him and began dialing Gwen’s number. He moved away, and a few seconds later she heard water running.

“About time you called,” Gwen said into her ear. “I was beginning to get worried.”

“We had a few problems.” Which was the mother of all understatements, but Gwen didn’t need to know the details until they’d gotten out of this mess safe and sound.

“Did you find the kids?”

“Yep. But they were too well guarded, and by that time, we had nothing much left in the way of weapons.”

“So why are you calling rather than coming back?”

“Because we’re being followed by a hawk shifter.”

“Damn.” Gwen paused, then added, “Where are you holed up?”

“At a motel near the main highway. We’ll wait for the attack, then come back.”

“I have a bad feeling about this, Kitty-cat.”

So did she. Especially given that the soul-sucker had already shown she wasn’t averse to using some form of explosive. It might be a case of third time lucky. “We really have no other choice.”

“I doubt whether that shifter will be hanging around once he thinks you’re stopping. Maybe you should just drive back here.”

“He knows what car we’re driving. It would be easy enough in a town this size to find it again.”

Gwen sighed. “True. And right now, when we’re so close to snatching the kiddies back, I don’t want to run the risk of letting the mara know she’s not only facing a wily young witch, but an old one, too.”

Kat’s smile felt tight. Right now, she didn’t feel particularly wily. Just cold, wet, and annoyed. “I’ve got warding stones, so I can use those. Just make sure you’re doing the same, in case this is all a ruse of some kind.”

“I’m sitting in a circle now, and it’s primed against magic and evil. I’ll be okay. Just make sure you call me when the attack is over.”

“Will do.”

She hung up the phone and listened to the patter of water as Ethan showered. She had a sudden image of water rolling down the taut muscles of his stomach and legs and closed her eyes, fighting the desire that surged through her. She might be annoyed by the man, might be hurt by his words and his continuing determination to walk away, but she still wanted him so intensely it hurt.

In love for sure, she thought grimly. But she could never let him know. Just as she could never let him know she might be pregnant. While she wasn’t so convinced he was telling the truth when he said he didn’t want kids, she was sure he meant it when he said he would hate anyone who tried to trap him that way.

But even if that hadn’t been the case, she wouldn’t have told him simply because she wanted him to stay because he loved her, not out of a sense of honor or duty. And if she couldn’t have his love, she didn’t want anything else.

She walked across to the window and watched the rain come down, feeling in it an echo of the tears she refused to shed.