Bad Boy Blues

We could’ve saved each other so much heartache.

But I’m glad we’re together now. Us against the world.

I’m glad I was with him when his mom passed away a couple of months ago.

Mrs. S called him with the news and we headed back to Princetown the very next day for the funeral.

We saw everyone: Maggie, Mrs. S, Grace, Tina, Leslie and Art. He’s doing great and he’s gotten so big. I can’t wait for the day when he’s the tallest kid in his class. No one will have the guts to pick on him.

Zach’s dad was there at the funeral too. He met with Zach like the whole prison incident never happened. Like, Zach never punched him and Mr. Prince never slapped Mrs. Prince.

As expected, nothing came of that incident, anyway.

I don’t know what’s wrong with rich people but I’m glad we’re out of that town. I’m glad Zach’s moving on.

He did the eulogy that he wrote himself.

I’ve never been prouder of him. Not even when he brought home books and notebooks and told me that he wanted to learn.

He wanted to be better. For himself.

Every night before going to sleep, we read together. It feels like a dream, where we’re naked and sweaty, wrapped up in a sheet, reading about love and passion.

Who knew reading could be so hot? Who knew I’d want to do it for the rest of my life? Maybe even get a degree in literature. But I’m not thinking that far ahead right now.

Right now, I’m in love.

I look down when the announcer introduces Zach aka The Dark Prince.

It’s a mini-version of a stadium with the well at the bottom and spectator area up top. I’m two floors up and the bottom looks way deeper than it did a second ago. Swallowing, I scan the wall that Zach will be riding on, going in circles.

God, I don’t want to imagine how far up the top is from the bottom and how hard the ground looks. Why can’t they have safety nets or something?

Why do they have to make it so dangerous?

I grip the railing tightly when the door on the far side of the well opens and Zach emerges from it.

He has his helmet on and his outfit is all black. Hence, the name.

He rides out to the middle, churning gravel in his wake and the sounds are deafening. I just stand there like a mute, on shaking legs as I watch him revving the bike and looking so invincible down there.

But he’s not invincible.

He’s just a… guy. A layered, beautiful guy I’m in love with and I’m so scared for him.

Blowing out a breath, I look up at the sky. It’s studded with stars.

Our stars.

They feel like ours now, mine and Zach’s. We watch them night after night, through the window above our bed. Sometimes, I watch them when he moves inside of me. Fast and furious, or slow and lazy.

I look to them now and ask them to keep him safe.

Please, keep him safe.

I whip my gaze down when the roar of his bike rises higher than the chant of the crowd. And then, he’s taking off. He rides toward the wall at a speed that steals my breath and before I can even blink, he slides up.

He’s there, on the wall.

I lean over the railing, hang my body out like so many other people as he circles the wall. He circles and circles, inching higher, gaining speed.

When he reaches the top, I bite my lip so hard I taste my blood. It’s metallic and full of nerves as I watch him finally go parallel to the ground.

In this moment, my nerves abate a little.

They’re there, of course but something else creeps in.

Something like adrenaline.

I feel like it’s coming from him. Just as he hits the top-most part of the wall, he feels elated. He feels like he’s conquered the world. He’s touching the sky because in this moment, he’s a star himself. Dark but still, bright.

And I smile even as my eyes sting.

It’s like I can feel him, his emotions through the space. I can feel how much he loves it. How much he revels in it.

This is freedom for him.

Butterflies flap just under my ribs and I put a hand on my stomach. I’m shaking but not just from the nerves.

I’m shaking from watching him go round and round. I’m shaking from watching him go down this man-made hole and come back up. All in a blink of an eye.

He’s light as air, and gravity doesn’t mean anything to him.

Zach doesn’t follow the basic laws of nature. He’s above that.

He is the dark prince.

He’s my prince and when his act is over and he brings his bike to the middle of the well again, I turn around.

I make my way through the chanting crowd and rush down the stairs. There’s a staff entrance at the bottom of the stadium and I flash my visitor pass to the guy standing guard.