Bad Boy Blues

Ryan chuckles again but the sound has lost its embarrassed quality. “And?”

“I just…” I shake my head, feeling flushed. “I never realized that you wanted to. Go on a date, that is.”

Shrugging, he runs his hands along his hair. “I’ve always wanted to but I never had the courage to ask you before. And with everything that happened last year, I didn’t want to put any pressure on you.”

What happened last year is a weight I always carry around. And even though I’m heavier for it, people treat me like I’m the most fragile, delicate thing ever.

Blinking my eyes, I clear my throat. “Yeah. I don’t think I can. I like you, but I can’t. It’s just that… I don’t think I’m ready. And with all the work and you know, I can’t.”

“I understand,” Ryan nods and there’s a slight twinge in my heart.

He reaches out and runs a thumb over my jaw.

“I won’t give up though,” he says with a twinkle in his eyes. “Now that I know you think I’m hot.”

With that promise, he leaves and all I can do is watch him go.

And then, I smile.

His thumb was soft and smooth. The only place I felt it was where he touched me, on my jaw.

Ryan’s touch was exactly what a touch should be: warm and fleeting. It didn’t radiate out to any other part of my body. It wasn’t consuming.

Not like his touch, scorching and electric. Something I’ll think about for days to come.

Still smiling, I walk inside the staff room and take a seat beside Tina. Mrs. S is yet to come and so everyone’s talking. Well, mostly gossiping, and of course, the topic of conversation is Zach.

Leslie, one of the maids, is extremely happy that he’s back. “I can’t believe how hot he’s become. Did you see that body?” She waves a hand over her face. “Man, oh man. I want him.”

Tina shushes her. “Keep your voice down, would you? If Mrs. S hears you, you’ll be on toilet scrubbing duty for the rest of the month.”

So Mrs. S has a rule: no sleeping with the masters of the mansion or the people they fraternize with. She says it’s bad for her reputation. We won’t be a clichéd house, where maids have affairs and end up pregnant.

I’ve only worked here for a few months but one of the girls got fired for sleeping with a guest who was here on the tour. I wasn’t there but rumor has it that Mrs. S caught them red-handed, doing it in one of the guest rooms in tower three.

Leslie waves her hand. “She isn’t here. Besides, there are ways to get around her. You don’t think everyone follows the rules, do you?”

Leslie is loud and fun and even though she’s a terrible gossip, I’ve always liked her. I just don’t believe everything that comes out of her mouth. But seeing that she’s talking about the guy who more or less ruined my entire education experience, I come up with a plan.

Nothing diabolical, just something fun. And I’m going to save Leslie a lot of heartbreak in the process.

“You don’t want to break the rules for him, trust me,” I tell her, leaning over so only she and Tina can hear me.

“What do you mean?” Leslie asks, interest written all over her pretty face.

I look left then right before focusing on her. “So, last night, at the party? There was this girl talking to one of her friends. And she was saying that when she tried to hook up with Zach earlier, he had a little problem.”

“No way,” Leslie breathes.

I nod and hold my finger up before folding it down. “And you know what, I don’t think that was the first time either.”

Leslie’s eyes go wide. “What do you mean?”

“I mean, I went to school with that guy.” Unfortunately. “I know things.”

Tina snorts. “Really?”

She knows I’m lying.

Leslie grabs my hand in excitement. “Are you serious? What things?”

I smirk. “Look, it could be just gossip. But back in school, I heard a rumor that he, you know, couldn’t perform, per se. So he had to take like, a pill or something.”

Leslie gasps.

Tina snorts again.

“I mean, listen, I don’t believe that blue pill thing. I think it was an exaggeration but… the not-performing thing could be true. But who knows? Gossip is gossip.”

Leslie nods. “Makes sense. Gossip is gossip. Such a shame though, if it’s true. That guy is fine.”

I sit back in my seat, satisfied and smiling. “Oh yeah, definitely.”

Tina shakes her head at me and I shrug. By the end of the day, everyone on the staff will know of Zach’s little problem. Whether they believe it or not, they’re going to wonder and that’s all I care about.

Fuck you, Zach.

We all go quiet when Mrs. S enters and starts firing off instructions like always. One of the girls is sick so I volunteer to take up her duties. It’s good. The more I work, the better. They’ll compensate me for the extra time and I’ll be that much closer to my goal.