Bad Bad Girl

I could feel the tears burn the back of my eyes. I couldn’t speak. All I could do was nod in agreement. Caine slowly leaned down and kissed me softly. He ran his fingers through my hair and down my spine. He kissed me with love and tenderness. He pulled his lips away and leaned back to look into my eyes.

“Neely, I love you.”

I smiled. “I love you, too.”

Caine hugged me tighter and held my head against his chest as he kissed the top of my head. I could hear his heartbeat and feel his chest rise with each breath. He had held me before many times. But this time was different. This time he was holding me like a man held his woman. He was holding on to me, never to let me go.

“This is meant to be. We are meant to be together. I have been denying my feelings for too long. You are what I want, Neely. You are what I’ve been looking for,” Caine said lovingly.

My heart was melting. I was in awe of this man. He made me feel so alive and so in love. He made me hopeful and excited for what the future held. I couldn’t imagine feeling anything but passion for this man. I couldn’t possibly be anything else other than hopelessly in love. How had we been anything else?

“Kiss me again…boyfriend.” I flirted with a renewed sense of excitement.

“My pleasure…girlfriend,” Caine murmured as he pressed his lips to mine. He moved his tongue past my lips and explored with the most sensual touch. Tingles shot through my body as I began to melt against his. His kiss was amazing. He was amazing.

9

We spent the day having a nice lunch and shopping for items Caine knew he would need after Sara had all her belongings out of the house. We talked about our future goals, our hopes, and dreams. We discussed what we wished for in a relationship, if we wanted children, and we talked about marriage. I thought I knew everything about Caine as a friend, but realized I still had a lot to learn about Caine as a boyfriend. I felt butterflies in my stomach and felt giddy throughout the entire day. Caine held my hand or put his arm around me as we browsed the shops. He would occasionally lean in and give me small kisses. It felt as if we had been dating for a lifetime. Everything felt so natural, so real. There were no awkward moments, or uncertainty on how to act. I had never felt so happy or felt so content. I didn’t want the day to end. As the sun began to go down, we came crashing through the door with shopping bags under our arms.

Caine dropped his bags and grabbed the ones I had in my hands. “I was thinking of starting a fire and having you and me relax in front of it with a nice bottle of wine. How does that sound?”

I nodded. “That sounds great!”

Caine got a fire started and opened a bottle of red wine. He poured us both a glass and raised it for a toast. “To a new chapter. You and I, in love.”

I raised my glass to his and took a sip. I loved how comfortable I was feeling. I snuggled closer to him on the couch enjoying the warmth from the fire and the heat coming from his body. Caine wrapped his arms tightly around me and held me close. We sat there in silence, staring at the fire for a long time until I felt I had to say something.

“Caine?”

“Yes?”

I took a deep breath. “Do you think we’re making a wise choice? I mean, I don’t want to risk our friendship if this doesn’t work out.”

Caine pulled away far enough so we could look into each other’s eyes. “I know. I’ve been thinking about that, too. All I know is I truly love you, and I no longer see you as just a friend. I want more.” He paused to take a sip of his wine. “I see a future for us. I want a future for us.”

I felt my heart flutter and could barely get the words to form. “I want that, too.”

Caine smiled. “Remember when I told you I have traditional and not so traditional thoughts on love?” He paused and watched me nod. “I need to know if you can accept my beliefs. Is this a type of relationship you can embrace?”

I took a large sip of my wine to clear the lump that was forming in my throat. I knew this topic was bound to come up. I wanted to give Caine whatever he wanted. I wanted to be the woman he desired. But I was completely naïve when it came to this. I had never heard of this lifestyle before. All I knew was that I trusted Caine. I wanted a relationship with him that would last a lifetime. But I was embarrassed with my lack of knowledge and comfort with the idea.