Every Time I Fall (Orchid Valley 3)

Standing, Kace smacks the table. “Give it some time. Sounds like you both have a lot to think about.”

“Thanks,” I mutter. I wait until he’s gone before looking at my phone again. This time there’s a message, but it’s from Amy, not Abbi.

Amy: I’ve really screwed up with you, haven’t I?

I rub my temples. While I give Abbi the time Kace suggested, I need to deal with Amy. I’m thinking a firm explanation of some boundaries. Boundaries I should’ve set a long time ago.

* * *

Abbi

What does a girl do when she’s brokenhearted? She calls a friend. But my friends all call each other and descend upon me en masse. Which is why, less than an hour after Dean walked away from me, I have a living room full of booze and sympathetic faces.

Brinley called up the forces—Stella, Savvy, and Layla—and filled everyone in on the arrangement between me and Dean, but apparently Stella already knew more than I confessed when she caught us making out in the dark hall at Brinley’s.

“I had to check on my brother after I found out what was going on between you two,” Stella says, pouring vodka into a martini shaker. “He’s had a thing for you for years, so the whole arrangement worried me.”

I scoff. “You’re ridiculous.”

Stella arches a brow. “You think I’m kidding? You dropped out of college and came home and started helping Dean and Kace with the business right when they needed it most, and my brother got all soft on you.”

“I totally missed this,” Brinley says. “How did I miss this?”

“Because he always swore they were just friends, but I knew there was more to it. It wasn’t until this summer that I found out what happened the night of your twenty-first.”

My stomach drops to the floor. “He mentioned that today.” I feel like I want to cry all over again. I was drunk and ranting that night. Cody had called to wish me a happy birthday, and it had sent me spiraling, grasping for an explanation for everything that had gone wrong between us. “I forgot I said any of that.”

“Said what?” Savvy asks.

Stella turns to me, and I hate that she’s going to make me repeat the awful words, but I need to own it. I need to face the damage I did so I can fix it. Even if Dean never wants me back, he needs to know that I was talking out my ass that night. Nothing I said was true. I take a breath. “I was dealing with a bad breakup.”

“Cody the gaslighting cheater?” Layla asks.

“Yeah,” I say. “Cody’s dad wasn’t around much when he was growing up, and any time he was an ass to me and I called him on it, he’d use that as a defense. His dad never taught him how to deal with anger. He never had an example for how to be kind in a romantic relationship. He doesn’t know how to be a good man because he never had an example, et cetera, et cetera.”

“What an ass,” Savvy says. “That’s the shittiest excuse. There are so many great guys who grew up without a dad.”

I nod, feeling even smaller.

Stella says, “And my brother is one of them.”

“Aw, shit,” Layla says. Unlike Brinley and I, Layla and Savvy didn’t grow up with Stella and Dean, so they don’t know their history.

“Like I said, the night of my twenty-first, Cody had called, and I was feeling weepy and sorry for myself, and I was trying to come to terms with the fact that he and I were never going to get back together.” I close my eyes, remembering. “I was sitting on the dock out at Lake Blackledge, and Dean sits next to me to make sure my drunk ass doesn’t fall in. We talked for a while and he said, ‘I think you deserve a good guy.’” I draw in a ragged breath. I hate that I was so oblivious—not just to his interest in me but to his experience and his feelings. “I just thought he was saying nice things to the birthday girl, and I started ranting about the kind of guy I wanted.”

Stella crosses her arms. I can tell it hurts her to imagine her brother living through this moment.

“I was thinking about Cody and his excuses and how I never wanted someone to hurt me like that again. I went on and on about how I wanted a guy who’d been raised with his dad around, because those were the guys who knew how to treat women. Those were the guys who’d be faithful and who wouldn’t run when times were hard.”

“Smithy said Dean had planned to ask you out that night, but you made him think he didn’t have a chance,” Stella says.

“Oh, no,” Layla says. “Poor Dean.”