His mind raced, weaving disastrous outcomes with his memories of her naked thighs. Stay with her. God, it was a terrible idea and a grand one, and every reason he'd ever had for not making love to her still applied. He no longer cared. He wasn't a damned saint.
"Where is this house?"
Alex smiled, then grinned, then squealed like a child and jumped into his arms to rain kisses over his face.
"I haven't agreed yet," he protested futilely before opening his mouth and kissing her back as her tongue stroked his. His body hardened and pulsed, aware, despite his words, that there was no turning back from this. He would have her finally, or she would have him.
"Tonight," he whispered fiercely. "Here. Stay here in Edinburgh."
When she shook her head, Collin felt suddenly sure he'd burn to ash if he didn't bury himself inside her soon.
"No." She gasped the word as he set his teeth to her neck. "Oh, God. No, not here. I want to be alone with you. No neighbors, no servants, just you." A moan. "The cottage is perfect. In the forest. No one will know."
Anger slashed him, sudden and sharp. "You've done this before."
"No!" She drew away, stumbling a little. "Of course not. I've only been there once. With my family."
God, he wanted to believe her. Wanted to be an exception in her life, not just one more indiscretion along the way, but she was so alive in his arms, not a woman to live staid and quiet as a spinster. He wasn't her first, but would he be her third or fourth or fifth? It shouldn't matter.
"Never mind." Her words were low, almost lost in me rustle of wind-blown trees. "Never mind."
"No, Alex. No . . . I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that."
"Well, you did. And why shouldn't you?"
"Forgive me. It was jealousy, nothing more. Not logic."
"Of course not." She shrugged, smiled, but her eyes shone too bright.
"That won't happen again, I swear. God knows I'm not a virgin either. Shall I tell you of my sins so you can use them against me in the future?" She laughed, happy again, and Collin's gut unwound.
"Maybe just one sin."
"A little one?"
She shook her head, resumed her stroll, skirts a swaying seduction.
"A big one, hmm?" He stepped to join her, boots crunching on the shell path, and sifted through his embarrassments. One in particular was excavated rather easily.
"Thought of something, have you?"
"I've never told anyone."
"Oh, perfect! A secret sin."
Grimacing, he tried to think how to phrase it, how to make it sound better. No luck. "My first time. She was a married woman."
"Why, Collin Blackburn, isn't adultery a mortal sin in the Catholic Church?"
He rolled his eyes at her mock distress. "I'm not Catholic."
"Oh."
"Still, it was wrong, and I was ashamed. After it was done, at any rate."
"I believe that's how it normally works."
"Mm. In my defense, I was very young and a little eager to discover the joys of women. She was happy to teach me."