"Of course."
"And, oh, it was lovely and, and . . . It was so much! He said he'd been wanting me so long and he couldn't stand it anymore. But then he stopped. And now he will barely look at me. And I've loved him for years!"
"Oh, he looks at you. But when he sees you watching, he turns away."
Joy leapt to painful life in her chest. "Does he? He watches me?"
"Absolutely."
"Why do men have to be such idiots? Why will he not just go to my father? Or better yet, kidnap me?"
"Don't ask me, Jeannie. I had to seduce Collin to get him in my bed. Oops." She clapped a hand over her mouth. Her other hand wobbled the flask.
"Seduce him." She thought of Fergus's kisses, thought of the way his hands had shaped her waist and drawn fire up her back. "Seduction. That might be the way then."
"I'm not sure that's a good idea. Collin resents it, I think. He holds it against me."
"Hmm. I rather like the idea though. And Collin will get over it. Don't worry."
Alex rubbed her eyes and sighed before thrusting the flask back to Jeannie. "Take this. I'm feeling a bit mushy."
Jeannie tipped it up for the last swallow and made herself set Fergus and her fantasies aside. "Do not worry over Collin," she said. "He's never been in love before, Alex. He is trying to find his way."
"In love? I don't think that's it."
"Of course it is. Give him time. He's a man who's used to hard work and discipline. He's no do
ubt scared to death. You'll see. And our whisky's gone. Shall we rejoin the boys?"
"I suppose. I rather like your brothers' stories."
"Well, just wait till later then. Collin keeps almost as good a whisky as my father."
They giggled their way back through the door and into the keep to join the men below.
For once, the great hall seemed stifling to Collin. He could see that it was not—his wife and all their guests were gathered in chairs pulled close to the fire—but he felt hot and restless. He wanted to get out, to stalk through the door and into the cold night beyond, but he stayed. He would not leave his wife alone with these men who grinned and winked and brought out the pink in her cheeks. These friends of his.
Collin had never winked at a woman in his life, had never even known he should, but Alex seemed to enjoy it. She giggled and laughed and chastised them for their naughty stories. And Fergus . . . Oh, Fergus she watched carefully, for what, he had no idea, but he did not need to know to find it insufferable. They weren't discussing land use, after all.
Still, he insisted to himself, Fergus was his best friend and the Kirkland men he'd known his whole life. And Alex was his wife, of course. He couldn't leave that aside. But he felt always uncertain around her, never knowing what to say now mat they were man and wife. He did not know if he should discuss the horses with her and the business, or if he should turn over the finishing of the house to her. She responded with interest to everything he said, but she was so attentive that he did not know how to live with that either—a woman who awaited him every evening and seemed to want something which he couldn't provide.
Her eyes had grown wary over the weeks and, when she was quiet and didn't know he was near, she seemed smaller, deflated somehow. Perhaps she'd begun to realize that life as a farmer's wife was neither exciting nor glamorous. She'd been here three weeks and the Kirklands were the first visitors they'd had. And Collin had no idea how to entertain her, outside the bedchamber at least.
But Fergus—he seemed always to know what to say to her, how to make her smile or laugh or coo with interest. Fergus had become her friend—perhaps her best friend, and Alexandra was unmatched in her beauty and sensuality. Collin felt mad with suspicion, and only more mad to know it was unfounded. He trusted her. Surely he did. "Collin?"
"What?" He looked up to find Douglas Kirkland looking him over with a raised brow, while everyone else watched with amused expectance. Except Alex, who chewed her lip in discomfort.
"I asked how ye managed to escape being murdered by the duke."
His wife shrugged helplessly in his direction.
"The duke?" Collin felt his face darken.
"Well for God's sake, we're not so far in the wilds that we didn't hear the rumors. And why else would you two have married so quickly if not for scandal, Blackburn?"
"Oh, why else?" Collin growled back.
"It wasn't all that scandalous!" Alex's words came fast and too high. "Which is how he escaped being murdered, of course."