Alpha Erased (Alpha Girl 9)

I’d figure out what was wrong with me eventually. Until then, I’d make another sandwich, and hope the hunger wouldn’t kill me before I had any answers.

Chapter Twenty

DASTIEN

There were times in my life when I’d done things that I wasn’t proud of, but this was a new level of weird for me. I was standing behind the door of my apartment, waiting for Tessa to open her door.

It was official. I was stalking my wife.

A couple years ago, I would’ve told anyone doing anything remotely like this to leave the girl alone. If she was interested, she’d let you know. And yet, here I was, waiting. Hoping she’d give me a chance to prove to her that I was worth talking to her.

It’d been a few hours since I bumped into her in the hallway, but it wasn’t enough. I needed to see her again. I wanted to talk to her again.

That’s all I wanted for now. Just to talk to her, to reassure myself that it really was her, to start proving to her that I was someone worth spending more time with.

Eventually, when I thought she’d say yes, I’d ask her on a date. I couldn’t do it after just one quick exchange in the hallway. I had to build to that, which meant I needed more time with her.

I had to keep reminding myself that I was starting over, but not from scratch. Because I knew Tessa. I’d lived in her head for almost a year. I knew what she liked and what she loved and what annoyed the hell out of her. Which meant I could win her back.

I would win her back.

But staying in this apartment was driving me nuts. It’d only been three freaking hours since I last saw her, and I was already going crazy? How was I supposed to make this work? I was used to doing things—fighting, hunting, teaching, but now I was just sitting here. Waiting.

Everyone was texting me, asking if I’d seen her yet, but I needed them to back off. I could tell them that I felt great about how this was going—about how I ran into her in the hallway—but that was a stretch. I’d fumbled that big time.

And I definitely couldn’t tell them that I’d wasted hours imaging ways to run into her so that I could tell her my name and get her cellphone number.

Maybe I should just go over there. I could ask for sugar for…brownies. Maybe I was making brownies. But then I’d actually have to make them from scratch.

I was sure I could figure that out if I had to. It couldn’t be that hard, could it? I always used a mix before, but I was sure people somewhere made them from scratch. I could find a recipe online, no problem. I should just knock on the door and—

And desperation wasn’t sexy. I just had to wait. She’d leave eventually.

Or maybe I should go knock. I was new here—that wasn’t a lie. I could ask her for a good place to grab dinner. Or—

A soft click and then a jingle of keys had me turning to the peephole.

There she was. My Tessa, yet not at all my Tessa. She was taller than my wife, with the wrong hair color, the wrong eye color. Her nose was bigger. Her lips thinner. Her face rounder. But underneath the magic hiding her, that was the one. My one.

She was wearing a pair of skinny jeans and a blouse and heels. Heels. That was most definitely not like Tessa. But the messy bun was there. That woman might not look like the Tessa I was used to seeing, but it was her.

She locked the door and turned toward the elevator. I wanted to know where she was going. We’d gotten her school schedule—which I’d memorized—but she’d already missed all her classes today.

Last night, Michael and I briefly talked about having someone watch her to make sure no one took her again, but we didn’t want to attract too much of her attention. We weren’t sure if she saw one of us too much before I had a chance to break the magic, if we’d put her at risk.

There were too many unknowns with this magic—too many ways it could go wrong—and I hated it.

But we decided that some members of the Wayfarer Pack would come to watch over her. She didn’t know any of them, and they were used to sliding into all kinds of situations. Wherever she was going, they’d follow her. I wanted to trust them with her, but I wasn’t sure I trusted anyone that much.

I counted to ten and then opened my door. I pretended not to notice her walking down the hall while I locked my door.

Could she tell that I was watching her out of the corner of my eye as she paused to look at me? I wasn’t sure.

I slid my keys into my pocket and turned to her. The woman I was looking at didn’t look anything like the one I was missing. Talking to her with the intention of getting her number felt like cheating.

But I wasn’t cheating. Everything was a lie. Everything I said and everything I saw.

I gave her a smile, but it wasn’t real either. I was trying, but not lying was one of the things that Tessa and I agreed on. We didn’t like it, and we sucked at it when we tried.