The Rebel Queen (Outlaw 1)

A brow rose over his eyes and I could practically feel his anger. “Play the rebel? My love, we are the rebels now.” He stopped and took a long breath, and then he was in my space, looming over me. “Zoey, this is not the time for us to fight. They need us. I know you think there’s got to be some way to get back, but there’s not. Even if we understood the mechanics of time travel, there’s too much at stake to risk it.”

Tears pulsed behind my eyes. “We have to fix it.”

“We did.” Danny moved into my space. His head dropped to mine, and there was pain in his voice. “We did what we were supposed to do. We helped our daughter take her place. We helped her find a male who will protect her and love her forever. And you feel that loss, too. I know I feel it. It will be a very long time before Summer can walk the Earth plane and come to holiday parties with us and meet her siblings. She might never be able to. We don’t know how her position works. We lost so damn much in what felt like a second, but they need us. I’m not merely talking about our kids—though they do. I’m talking about every creature on the plane. If Myrddin succeeds, the Earth plane changes. Every human will be made slaves to the demons. Every supernatural will be in chains or twisted to serve the demons’ will.”

Why couldn’t he see what I wanted to do? “He won’t have a chance if we fix things.”

“Some things can’t be fixed,” Daniel replied. “We don’t get do-overs. We deal with the hand we’ve been given and we move on. I’ve known this since the day I died. Maybe longer. Maybe since my father died, or before that when my mom died and I was shuffled around. That’s what Dev is talking about. Despite everything you’ve been through, you’ve never really faced a loss like this.”

I stepped back. “I faced losing you. I assure you those years of my life weren’t fun.”

“And you had your dad to help you through it,” Dev pointed out. “Daniel came back, and he watched over you, too. Yes, Daniel died, but it worked out in the end. You’ve never had to face something you couldn’t fix. We can’t fix this, Zoey.”

“You’re not even willing to try.”

“I’m not willing to waste time on something that has to fail,” Daniel corrected. “You know as well as I do that there is a balance to be kept. If we change something in the past, the effects on the future could be unimaginable.”

I didn’t want to hear about effects. The effects I felt now were unimaginable, but they were getting through to me. No amount of time with my children mattered if Summer doesn’t take her place. If we don’t fall through that painting, Marcus likely dies. Dev dies when the outer planes fall, and then we die.

The baby inside me is never conceived.

And the payment for all of that, the bill that came with survival, had been paid in full by Rhys and Lee and Evan and Fen. By my father.

“It’s okay to mourn now.” Dev had moved in behind me. “We’re alone. I know I feel it. I feel every year we lost with them.”

Daniel reached for me. “Please, we need to be together on this. I know I need you now, Z.”

I needed them, and I was letting my anger and fear keep us apart. I’d lost so much time with my kids. I couldn’t lose more because they didn’t agree with me. We’d all had a rough day, had rough days in front of us, and we needed to be together.

I let the tears roll down my cheeks as Daniel brushed them away with his thumbs. I stared up at him. We hadn’t lost each other. Our children were still alive, and there was another growing inside me. It might have to be enough for now. I wasn’t giving up on finding a way to change things, but for tonight I let it go and let myself be with them.

Daniel’s mouth found mine, bringing us together as Dev’s magic started to pulse through the room.

Daniel kissed me long and deep, his tongue sliding along mine even as his hands did the same to the curves of my body. I felt Dev behind me, felt the hard line of his erection against the small of my back. His hands moved around to cup my breasts as he kissed the nape of my neck.

Goddess, I needed this.

“I know this wasn’t the way you thought we would come home,” Dev whispered. “But it ends the same. No matter where we go, each day ends with me loving you. Me loving you both.”