The Winner Stands Alone

She's never done that before, but she's prepared to do anything now. Besides, who hasn't dreamed of sleeping with a movie star?

She looks at the sea again. She could have gone back to the apartment and changed her clothes, but she's superstitious. If a pair of jeans and a white T-shirt were enough to get her this far, she should at least wait until the end of the day to change her clothes. She loosens her belt and sits in the lotus position and starts to do some yoga breathing. She breathes slowly, and body, heart, and thoughts all settle into place.

She sees the launch approaching. A man jumps out and says:

"Gabriela Sherry?"

She nods, and the man asks her to go with him. They get into the launch and set off across a sea crowded with yachts of all types and sizes. The man doesn't say another word, as if he were far away, perhaps dreaming about what might be going on in the cabins of those small boats or how good it would be to own one. Gabriela hesitates: her head is full of questions and doubts, and a sympathetic word can often make a stranger into an ally who might help with valuable tips on how to behave. But she doesn't know who he is. He might have influence with Gibson or be merely a no-account assistant who gets landed with jobs like picking up unknown actresses and taking them to his boss.

Best to say nothing.

Five minutes later, they draw up alongside a huge white boat. The name on the prow is Santiago. A sailor climbs down a ladder and helps her aboard. She passes through the spacious central reception room in which preparations are under way for what looks like a big party later that night. She walks toward the stern of the ship, where there is a small swimming pool, two tables shaded by parasols, and a few sun loungers. Enjoying the afternoon sun are Gibson and the Star!

"I wouldn't mind sleeping with either of them," she thinks, smiling to herself. She feels more confident, although her heart is beating faster than usual.

The Star looks her up and down and gives her a friendly, reassuring smile. Gibson gives her a firm handshake, gets up, takes one of the chairs from the nearest table, and tells her to sit down.

Then he phones someone and asks for the number of a hotel room. He repeats it out loud, looking at her.

It was just as she imagined--a hotel room.

He switches off his phone.

"When you leave here, go straight to this suite at the Hilton. That's where Hamid Hussein's clothes are on display. You've been invited to tonight's party in Cap d'Antibes."

It wasn't at all as she imagined. The part was hers. And she would be going to a party in Cap d'Antibes, a party in Cap d'Antibes!

He turns to the Star.

"What do you think?"

"I think we should hear what she has to say."

Gibson nods and makes a gesture meaning "Tell us a little about yourself." Gabriela starts with the drama course she took and the advertisements she's appeared in. She notices that the two men are no longer listening. They must have heard the same story thousands of times. And yet she can't stop, she's talking faster and faster, feeling that she has nothing more to say and that this chance of a lifetime depends on finding just the right word, which she is patently failing to do. She takes a deep breath and tries to appear at ease; she wants to seem witty and so she makes a joke, but she's incapable of departing from the script her agent taught her to follow in such interviews.

After two minutes, Gibson interrupts her.

"That's great, but we know all that from your CV. Why don't you talk about you?"

Some inner barrier suddenly crumbles. Instead of panicking, her voice grows calmer and steadier.

"I'm just one of millions of people in the world who have always dreamed of being on a yacht like this, looking at the sea, and talking about the possibility of working with at least one of you gentlemen. And you both know that. I doubt there's anything else I might say that will change anything very much. Am I single? Yes. But as is the case with all single women, there's a man back home who's madly in love with me and is waiting for me in Chicago right now, hoping that things here will all go horribly wrong."

Both men laugh, and she relaxes a little more.

"I want to get as far as I can, although I know I'm almost at the limit of what's possible, given that in the world of movies, my age is already against me. I know there are lots of people out there with as much or more talent than me, but I was chosen--why I don't know--and I've decided to run with it. This might be my last chance, and perhaps the fact that I'm saying this now will decrease my value, but I have no choice. All my life, I've imagined a moment like this: doing an audition, getting chosen, and being able to work with real professionals. It's finally happened. If it goes no further than this meeting and I return home empty-handed, at least I know I got here because of two qualities: integrity and perseverance.

"I'm my own best friend and my own worst enemy. Before coming here, I was thinking that I didn't deserve it, that I wouldn't be able to meet your expectations, and that you had probably chosen the wrong candidate. At the same time, my heart was telling me that I was being rewarded because I hadn't given up and had fought to the end."

She looks away and suddenly feels an intense desire to cry, but controls herself because that might be seen as emotional blackmail. The Star's mellow voice breaks the silence.

"There are honest people in the movie world, people who value professionalism, just as there are in any industry. That's why I've got where I am today, and the same with our director here. I've been through exactly what you're going through now. We know how you feel."

Her whole life passes before her eyes. All the years of seeking without finding, of knocking on doors that wouldn't open, of asking and never getting an answer and being met with blank indifference, as if she didn't exist. All the nos she had heard when no one even seemed to notice she was alive and at least deserved a response.

"I mustn't cry."

She thinks about all the people who have told her over the years that she's chasing an impossible dream and who, if this turned out right, would be sure to say: "I always knew you had talent!" Her lips start to tremble. It's as if all these thoughts were suddenly flowing out of her heart. She's glad to have had the guts to show that she's human and frail and that being chosen has made a huge difference to her soul. If Gibson were now to change his mind about her, she could take the launch back to shore with no regrets. At the moment of battle, she had shown real courage.