Four Real

I shake my head. “That’s not me. I can’t do that. And maybe I’m putting too much pressure on the situation, but I’ve waited so long that I want my first time to be with someone who means something to me.”

Olivia puts her hand on mine again and gives it a squeeze. “Don’t worry. Things will work out. I’m sure they will. And I don’t think guys will be as concerned with your virginity as you assume they’ll be.”

I give her a smile, grateful for her positive attitude, even though I can’t manage to see things her way right now.

“You might feel better if you go out more, though. Open up a bit to guys?” She dips one of the fries in the maple mustard sauce that came with them. “You’re not going to find someone special if you aren’t giving men a chance.”

“You’re probably right.”

As I take a bite of one of the small sandwiches, she nudges my arm and tilts her head to direct my attention to my left, where our waiter is passing with a tray full of drinks. “He is cute, though, don’t you think? Nice and tall.”

I watch him for a minute. He doesn’t look as muscular as any of the Evans brothers, but he has pretty eyes and a nice haircut.

While we eat, Olivia steers the conversation to lighter topics, telling me funny stories she’s heard from her hair salon clients and cute things her toddler niece has done recently. She also casually mentions that she’s submitted an application to be a contestant on For Keeps, the dating show where thirty or so people compete on national television to find a husband or wife.

I pause, mid-sip near the bottom of my drink. “Are you serious?”

“I told you I was planning to do it.”

“I thought you were joking! Why would you want to do that?”

Olivia gestures to offer me the last fried pickle, and when I shake my head, she snags it. “You’ve seen the men they have on there. Why wouldn’t I want to do it?”

“But on national TV …” Here I am, apparently too closed off to show a guy I’m even interested, and my best friend wants to date dozens of men while millions watch.

She shrugs. “There’s only a small chance that I’ll even be contacted, but it can’t hurt to try.”

“Well, I wish you luck.” I tap the rim of my glass to hers before I take the last drink.

Our waiter reappears. “Would you ladies like anything else?” Olivia looks to me, and when I shake my head, he pulls a pad from the pocket of his apron and extracts the bill, which he lays in the middle of the table. He slides a second folded piece of paper in front of me. “This is my number. I’d like to take you out sometime. If you’re interested, call me.”

It’s obvious he’s been flirting with me, but I wasn’t expecting this. I feel my cheeks redden as I nod. “Okay. Thanks.”

When he leaves to run Olivia’s credit card, she nudges my foot under the table. “Will you call him?”

“I don’t know. Maybe.”

My friend doesn’t push, and I appreciate it. “Oh, I almost forgot!” Olivia lifts the gift bag that had been moved aside to make room for the food. “You haven’t opened your present yet.”

I reach in, and amidst the pale pink tissue paper, find a small white box. Inside, there’s a delicate bracelet featuring a gold butterfly charm.

“This is beautiful! Thank you.”

“Do you like it?” She looks pleased. “I saw it and thought it suited you. Now that we’ve been talking, I’ve decided it’s symbolic.”

I give her a questioning glance.

“This is going to be your year to spread your wings, B!”

I want to groan at the cheesy sentiment, but actually, I’m touched. I’ve been complaining about my life and bemoaning my lack of growth, but it’s all up to me. I need to make things happen in order for things to change. I need to learn to fly.

6

A secret

When I pull into the driveway at home, I’m surprised to see a light on in the window of my sister’s apartment. The only other cars here are hers and our parents’, so I take a chance that she’s alone.

Pop music sounds through the door, but the volume goes down a few seconds after I knock. “Look who it is. The birthday girl. C’mon in.” She swings the door wide and I do a quick scan to confirm that none of her men are with her tonight.

“I was surprised to see you here.” Her loveseat is covered with piles of clothes, so I pull out a chair at her small dining table and take a seat.

“The guys are out of town at a conference, so I’m spending the night here.” Lacy was apparently sorting through the clothing when I arrived and she resumes as we talk. “How was your day?”