The Sinner (Notorious 1)

Anger, I could handle, but this sadness gutted me.

I shouldn’t have done this.

“Wait a second.” Margot’s voice cut across the porch like a knife. Right. It wasn’t only Savannah I’d lied to, and Margot didn’t seem sad at all. Her face was utterly composed, her eyes snapping. She was furious. “You might not care, Savannah, but I sure as hell do.”

“What’s going on?” Katie asked from her spot at Margot’s side, and I blew out a hard breath as I smashed, face-first, into rock bottom. I’d lied to a kid. A kid. Tried to use a kid for information. Christ, what is wrong with me? “Why doesn’t Matt have any clothes on?”

“An excellent question,” Margot said, her voice tart and I saw Savannah stiffen, her lips go white. I stepped in front of her, shielding her from Margot’s chilling stare.

Margot blinked, surprised. Frankly, so was I, but I’d hurt Savannah enough. I wouldn’t let anyone throw around words to hurt her more.

“Interesting,” Margot said, watching all of us. “Why don’t you get dressed, Matt, and meet us all in the library in ten minutes.”

“I have some questions of my own,” I told her, meeting her flinty blue eyes. “And I’m not leaving without some answers.”

“The library,” Margot said. “And let’s make it five.”

SAVANNAH

I stood outside the library doors and forced myself not to twitch. Not to chew on my nails. My palm still stung from the slap, my face still burned from a sick shame, but I forced myself to be the eye in the middle of the storm.

Utterly and totally still. Composed. Even though I seethed.

He was in there. Sitting at the piano.

Wearing those fucking glasses!

My head hit the wall with a quiet thunk.

“Slightly overdressed, aren’t you?” Margot’s voice accompanied a hand at my shoulder and I shrugged it away.

Just as I tried to shrug away memories of his hands and lips, his kiss.

“I’m cold,” I said, pulling the edges of my cardigan around my waist. A cardigan over a turtleneck was overkill for summer in Bonne Terre, but there was no way I was showing that man an inch of my flesh.

“Your hair—” Margot reached up to touch the tight bun at the back of my neck but I stepped away.

“It’s fine. Everything is fine. Let’s get this done with.”

I stepped toward the door, ready to face down the devil if it meant Matt whatever-his-name-was would be leaving, but Margot put a hand on my shoulder.

“You want to tell me what happened?” Margot asked.

“No.” I laughed. “I definitely do not.”

“You slept with him.”

“Not…entirely.”

“You like him.”

I snorted. “Liked, maybe.”

“After Eric—Don’t glare at me, Savannah.”

“I don’t want to talk about this, Margot.”

“You never want to talk about this,” Margot snapped.

“Lower your voice, for crying out loud.”

“You didn’t want to talk about Katie’s father when it was happening, or when he left, or when you got pregnant or—”

“Mom?”

I whirled to find both Katie and Matt standing in the doorway.

“Honey?” The word sounded like a croak. I hoped the expression on my face was a smile, I wanted it to be, but judging by Katie’s confusion and Matt’s horror, I wasn’t quite hitting the mark.

“What are you talking about?” Katie asked, her voice so small, her eyes so worried as they darted between Margot and Savannah.

I glared hard at Margot. This wasn’t something they talked about. Ever. Katie had never even heard the name Eric.

“Mom?”

“Ah—” My mind was a wilderness, nothing but bears and dark and fear. Lots of fear. I didn’t want to cry, or scream, or slap the glasses off Matt’s handsome face, but I felt dangerously close to all three.

At some point this conversation was inevitable, I understood that. I wasn’t stupid. But in the few times I’d been brave enough to imagine a scenario, Katie was older, I was more prepared and it didn’t take place in front of another man who’d lied to me.

When my world fell apart, it really fell apart.

“Me,” Matt said, quietly, his eyes dark and serious behind his glasses. “They’re talking about me.”

Katie’s gaze darted to him, fury sending out sparks.

I didn’t—couldn’t—say anything. Looking at him, at his sympathetic eyes, I had no words. He had proven he was no knight in shining armor, he no longer needed to act the part.

Regardless, he’d given me a way out of this much-dreaded conversation.

Perhaps I’d thank him by not smacking him blind.

“Why don’t you go play games on my laptop,” I said to Katie—a rare treat the girl would never be able to resist.

“Okay,” she said warily, knowing something was up.

We all watched Katie climb the steps.

“We should go inside,” Margot said, as if inviting everyone to tea.

“Absolutely,” I said and stormed past Matt, determined not to smell him or feel his heat.

Juliette stood inside, milky sunshine splashed across her face as she stared down at a framed photo in her hand, picked up from the table chock-full of family pictures.