The Drawing of the Dark

Memories now rushed vehemently through his mind, uncontrollable. Calad Bolg, he thought, the sword remembered in the legends as Excalibur. He recognized it also from his dream - it was the sword he'd ordered his attendant to throw into the lake - and from other dreams he'd had during his life, all of which he'd forgotten upon awakening, but which came back to him now. I've killed

quite a few men with this, he thought, many long years ago. I killed Mordred, my son, with it.

'You recognize it.' There was only a hint of a question-mark at the end of Aurelianus' sentence.

'Of course,' Duffy nodded sadly. 'But what about Brian Duffy?'

'You're still Brian Duffy. As much as you ever were. But you're Arthur, too, and that kind of outshines everything else. Brandy and water tastes more like brandy than water, after all.'

'1 suppose so.' He hefted the sword and tried a ponderous cut-and-thrust, chopping a notch in the cabinet. 'It's awful heavy,' he said, 'and I like a fuller guard. Swordplay has changed since the days when this was forged. They... we...wore heavy armor then, and swords weren't used for defense.'

'It's a good sword,' Aurelianus protested. -

'Certainly, to hang on a wall or chop trees down with. But if I were going to use this in combat, I'd want the blade narrowed and shortened by at least a foot, the grip shortened by five inches, and a solid bellguard welded around this crosspiece.'

'Are you out of your mind? That's the finest sword ever made. I don't think you could shorten the blade - that isn't everyday steel, you know.'

'I remember how well it hews armor. But we never parried in those days, just traded axe-type blows until one guy's armor gave way. I'd take a swing at someone now with this, and he'd disengage and put his point in my nose before I'd even begun to swing mine back in line. I think I'd be more comfortable with a regular rapier, thanks. Save this for scything wheat.'

Aurelianus was outraged. 'This is the most foolish thing I've ever heard. It's Calad Bolg, damn it! Show some respect.'

Duffy nodded, acknowledging the reproach. 'Sorry. I'll

take it out back and try a few passes at a fence post.'

'Fine. In about an hour we'll ride out for the King.'

Duffy nodded and turned to leave, then halted and spun to face Aurelianus again. 'You.. .wore your hair longer then. And you had a beard.'

The old man laughed softly and nodded. 'Your memory is clearing, Arthur.'

'Yes.' At the door Duffy paused, and said over his shoulder, 'You used to be a much calmer man, Merlin.'

'Times were simpler then,' Aurelianus nodded sadly.

The Irishman slowly picked his way back down the stairs. He felt as if the walls and roofs of his mind were being shaken, and falling away here and there to reveal an older landscape. But those walls and hallways are what's Brian Duffy, he thought mournfully. And now that I can remember both lives, I can see I've had much more enjoyment and relaxation as Duffy than I did as Arthur.

At the bottom of the stairs he stopped. I may be... this primordial king, he thought, but by God I'll live in the crumbling personality that is Brian Duffy. And I won't carry this sword; the very sight and feel of it are impacts against those poor mind-walls.

He bounded back up the stairs and rapped on Aurelianus' door with the sword's pommel. The sorcerer pulled the door open, surprised to see him back so soon. 'What is it?' he asked.

'I... I don't want this sword. I'll get another somewhere. Here.' Aurelianus just stared at him. 'Look,' Duffy insisted, almost tearfully. 'You'd better take it, or

pitch it into the canal - or that moonlit lake next time I come across it,' he added, half to himself.

At that Aurelianus paled and reeled back. 'What? What moonlit lake, Llyr help us, it's only April! Tell me.'

The Irishman was surprised by this response. 'Don't get excited,' he said. 'To tell you the truth, I think it's probably just an alcohol-hallucination. I'm sure it's nothing to -'Tell me.'

- get upset about.. .Oh, very well. Twice on, uh, Friday, in the middle of the day, I saw very clearly - even felt the cold wind of it - a wide lake under a full moon. And then -,

'Who were you with?' Aurelianus snapped. 'You must have been with some doomed or dying person, for whom death's door was already ajar.'

Duffy was impressed and uneasy. 'Yes, I was. Epiphany's father, as a matter of fact.'

The sorcerer looked a little relieved. 'I hoped it was something like that. What you. were seeing in these.. .visions?. . .was -'It was where King Arthur died,' Duffy said.

'How did you know that?' exclaimed the sorcerer, upset again.